Backleading.

Discussion in 'Salsa' started by Matrix, Aug 10, 2005.

  1. rhythm mouse

    rhythm mouse New Member

    Okay, now that's cool. And as much as my husband says he won't go to lessons with me, he's always been very supportive, and might be willing to help me in this way. I'll need to start a new thread... how to convince your SO/husband/wife to join you dancing. Thanks - I'll give this a shot, too.
  2. kdogg

    kdogg New Member

    I think I came across a thread on that issue.
  3. Medira

    Medira New Member

    You're welcome! Be sure to let us know how it goes. :)

    I agree with kdogg too, I think there is a thread about getting your SO to dance... I'd search for it, but I'm on my way out in a minute.
  4. rhythm mouse

    rhythm mouse New Member

    Okay, I'm back from my private (fox trot, samba) & group lesson (mambo), and I mentioned this concern I have with backleading to my instructor. He reassured me that another student of his has been at this 2 years, and is just now beginning to follow more consistently. I told him that was unacceptable for me, that I'd be working on it now.
    I mentioned that I enjoyed dancing the other night, but this one lead was the "nudging" type (quote from tacad); the owner of the club had danced with me the week before also, and he was so strong, I had no opportunity to back lead. I'm a little intimidated by his strength (I wound up dancing a fast salsa with him, and did 4 spins, and a few deep dips - a bit breathless by the end, though fun).

    Since my instructor is a strong lead, there was no need to loosen up my right arm; I did focus on the connection and maintaining a good frame, and it felt better. He was encouraging (but then he usually is).

    When it came to the group practice (all 2 of us), I was paired with a lead I'd never met before, with about a year's experience - mostly in salsa. His frame wasn't so strong, nor were some of his leads, so I loosened my right arm a little, and waited for him to decide (talk). I think I've been worried that it will look like I don't know the steps, but I noticed my instructor (who was teaching group) gave a LOT more feedback to him about leading me better. A few times he said, "don't just leave her out there". All in all, I took heart. I have MILES to go, but this was all much better. THANKS for all your ideas and support - it gave me something to look forward to, rather than dread.
  5. rhythm mouse

    rhythm mouse New Member

    Okay, I've been through about 44 pages of forum topics searching for "getting your SO to learn dance" and the like, and I've come up short. If anyone can locate the topic on convincing your spouse/SO to take up dance along with you, I'd be very interested in reading what others have to say. I promised to be very patient with my dear husband without pressuring him to take lessons (who is a gem in every sense), but I would love for him to dance with me. I figure - he doesn't expect me to run marathons with him, so I can't expect him to follow my passion. I just think he'd find it more enjoyable than he currently believes.

    If anyone can connect me with this past discussion, I'd appreciate it!
  6. tacad

    tacad New Member

  7. luh

    luh Active Member

    glad you like it
    luh
  8. luh

    luh Active Member

    take a look at the thread tacad posted!
    luh
  9. rhythm mouse

    rhythm mouse New Member

    Well, THAT is a loaded board... I'll admit the word "force" hadn't entered my mind, and as such it wasn't in the search query. On the other hand, I found a few interesting ideas buried in there, that were more along the lines of what I need. Two good pointers there:

    1. Let him know how enticing it is for HIM to be the dance partner (there's a lot more detail involved, but I got it), since he probably doesn't realize the sensuality involved, and

    2. Don't try to be the teacher or the critic. Let him learn (if he gets as far as a class) from the pro, and simply be encouraging.

    Enough said - I won't continue off-topic. It's amazing just how much ground this group covers in a relatively short period of time! Thanks!
  10. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    the reason why he isn't interested would be helpful in trying to advise you...is it his self-confidence iis it a mere lack of interest?
  11. Sagitta

    Sagitta Well-Known Member

    Good idea of moving the topic of encouarging a spouse to dance to the appropriate topic "rhythm mouse". To all thsoe interested the link is below:

    http://www.dance-forums.com/viewtopic.php?topic=7712

    And thanks also to luh in trying to point it out, by bumping up the topic in teh active topics listing.


    8)
  12. luh

    luh Active Member

    every time sagitta ;)
    luh

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