Close to giving up.

Discussion in 'Ballroom Dance' started by dgarstang, May 10, 2013.

  1. Hedwaite

    Hedwaite Well-Known Member

    Jude:
    "I still think you should try a showcase or a competition. I think the best evidence is that social dancing just isn't, and isn't likely going to be your thing."

    Hedwaite agreeing WITH Jude:
    "[...]Jude makes a good point. It's the "social" part that needs (a lot of) work."

    Was I somehow unclear? It was late, and I was on a dance high.
  2. JudeMorrigan

    JudeMorrigan Well-Known Member

    No, no. I was pretty much agreeing with your agreement. Don't mind me, it's been a long week.
  3. dgarstang

    dgarstang Member

    Hi Zhena. I just had a look at their schedule and it's all international. I've intentionally stayed away from international. There's a high probability that followers at parties won't know international, and that's only going to make it even harder to lead. Yes? No?
  4. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    well...samba and QS are international dances.....(yes, occasionally done at American style studios)...but if you want more QS, and VW for that matter, you might want to re-think your perspective
    stash and danceronice like this.
  5. dgarstang

    dgarstang Member

    Well, that's funny. VW is basically left turns with a hook step, right turns, and change steps, at the most basic level. No rise and fall. I don't know anything about international waltz, but those steps are very American.

    I guess I might as well give them a try though. I used to do the taxi dancing at CBD on a Thursday night. Not any more. It's sad. None of the male instructors ever show up, and it's unusual to see more than 2 female instructors show up. Result is... crickets chirping. If some of the male instructors showed, it would bring in more female students.

    opendoor, why so many dances? Unusual you'd ask that. So many because I don't want to be sitting out at parties. I get really frustrated when I look at the monitor and I see a long sequence of west coast swing, samba, quickstep, viennese waltz, bolero, rumba (ok, I know rumba but don't really like it) all strung together. The big six (waltz, foxtrot, ec swing, tango, cha-cha, rumba?) isn't good enough.
  6. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    :rolleyes:..um ...they are very BOTH...perhaps if you go .....you might LEARN that
    dlliba10, danceronice and dancelvr like this.
  7. dancelvr

    dancelvr Well-Known Member

    Those steps are very International. Both International and American VW have the four basic steps (natural turn, reverse turn, and forward and backward change steps. ) within the Bronze syllabus. American is the style that adds several different steps and movements beyond those four basic steps, and is danced at a slightly slower tempo than International.
    dlliba10, Loki and fascination like this.
  8. dancelvr

    dancelvr Well-Known Member

    And, I have never in my life heard of a "hook step."
  9. HappyFeet

    HappyFeet New Member

    Ok, so maybe the 'social' part is a difficulty... still... this is what I think would significantly boost Doug's enjoyment of social dancing.

    choice e) focus on the lady. Take an interest in her, enjoy how she dances, think about what she says if there's opportunity to talk, try to show her a good time regardless of her skill and experience. Look to give more than you get.

    If you focus on her more than on yourself, and if you can get her to have fun, I'd bet VOILA, suddenly you're having a good time at social dances too, regardless of whether this figure or that move went well. Cultivate your sense of humor - laugh together about the mistakes!

    There is nothing more charming than a lead - even a very new one - who is trying be delightful.

    On a related note: after 1.5 years dance lessons, my DH leads whatever goes through his mind; he mixes and matches from other dances, he screws things up as regularly as I do....but he does it all with such enthusiasm. Result: he is very delightful.
    GGinrhinestones and flightco like this.
  10. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    I think, having read many of this OP's posts, you have asked him to do something that would be exceedingly difficult for him to do ...
  11. HappyFeet

    HappyFeet New Member

    Agreed, but he says he tries things. So maybe he'll have enough of an open mind to try this.

    I generally get very grumpy when asked to change my perspective totally and do something new and uncomfortable....that's how I know it's worth giving a try.

    But acknowledging that what works for me, does not necessarily work for Doug.
  12. Hedwaite

    Hedwaite Well-Known Member

    A hook step is something we've had to UN-teach all of our students who've listened to the one "professional student" student in class who unsolicitedly doles out WRONG advice whenever he's allowed to- which isn't often anymore. It's "politely discouraged."

    To the best of my knowledge and efforts in translating (and in OP's post, it definitely seems to vary some), it occurs in a (left) box-step when the leader steps backward on his right foot. He "hooks" his foot around first, commits his weight to it, and then moves to the side of that. For an added bonus, the follower gets to do that when she's going back-right. Most people teach a simplified left rotating box without 'hooking'- straight back, small when on inside of rotation, rotate, roll onto foot- and the phrasing isn't right, but I'm trying harder to be brief.

    As an added bonus, we've also had to unteach people who "duck under the clothesline!" when closing off their forward or backward change step. Because that's "how you do swing and sway!"
  13. dgarstang

    dgarstang Member

    What Hedwaite said. :)
  14. jiwinco

    jiwinco Member


    Define fun.... everyone has a different definition of what make it "fun".

    I used to country dance, in a bar only, and fun was knowing enough to dance all night. I have been competing in ballroom for 8 years now, fun is mastering more open choreography and improving technically. I also had a teacher once say to me when I had been dancing for 5 years, and complaining that I couldn't get a move... that I was a baby, I was only 5 in my dancing... I had a long way to go. Maybe you are expecting too much too soon.
    chomsky likes this.
  15. opendoor

    opendoor Well-Known Member

    This in turn is quite fishy for me. Usually you do not dance according to a playlist at a monitor, but to the music actually in your ears. Can you recognize each rhythm? You can find out that a lot of the mentioned dances got a broad overlap in music. Some even share the same music, as for instance bolero and rumba! Also ECS is much more versatile as you might think. Socials anyway got different rules than classes.
  16. Mr 4 styles

    Mr 4 styles Well-Known Member

    heck no

    that's why I dance all 19 and salsa hustle wcs AT and country

    more lessons dude that's the key!!:D

    ( this post sponsored by arth... err fred... errr...)
  17. Loki

    Loki Active Member

    I can empathize with you, Doug, but why all the drama? Dancing is supposed to be fun. Lace 'em up and get out there. You might crash and burn but who hasn't? Your amount of angst is at least partly yours to control.

    Sincere best wishes and luck!
    leee likes this.
  18. twnkltoz

    twnkltoz Well-Known Member

    It is common for beginner ballroom dancers to need some help from the board to know what dance goes with the music. When there are so many different styles, it takes a while to really get it. It's not like AT. That said, he didn't even say he needed it for that. It's also useful for knowing what dances are coming up.
  19. Lilly_of_the_valley

    Lilly_of_the_valley Well-Known Member

    From what I have read, you do not particularly like social dancing and basically are not getting the whole point of that endeavor -- enjoying the physical and musical connection with another human being in a company of mind like individuals. I am not saying there is anything wrong with that. As someone already mentioned, not everything is supposed to be for everyone.
    If you skip parties, and just go to classes and lessons, you still benefit quite a bit from that.
    May I suggest yet another place to attend dance classes in your area. They also have parties and socials if you wish to pursue that avenue.
    http://www.cpaaartscenter.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=13&Itemid=27
  20. snapdancer

    snapdancer Active Member

    I agree with you IndyLady, but for a new lead putting this into practice not quite so easy. I can do that for some dances in which I'm experienced, others not so much.

    Wondering if learning to follow before starting to lead gave you a leg up on that?

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