No, my way isn't always the best. But in this case, her teacher seems to be toying with her (making appts, breaking them), which sends up red flags. Also, there's the "no fraternization" (sp?) aspect--I think I remembered her saying that. She stands to lose a teacher, he could stand to lose a job. All without any sort of definitive indication on his part that he's for real and not just messin' with her head. As for the messy situations you describe...I got no clue. I'm kind of relationship stupid--things have to be spelled out clearly for me.