Dancing with your instructor

Discussion in 'General Dance Discussion' started by SuzieQ, Apr 24, 2006.

  1. SuzieQ

    SuzieQ New Member

    I have a problem sometimes dancing with my instructor. I love him to pieces, trust him, have fun with him, but...I seem to be able to have really "good" dances with other guys--sexy chas, romantic night-club sways, fun & flirty WCS, etc.
    But I'm more inhibited with him--afraid of making mistakes, I guess. Does anyone have any insight into this and/or a way to make it better?
     
  2. mamboqueen

    mamboqueen Well-Known Member

    I have the same problem. There's a little wall that doesn't let me emote with him as much as I do with some other dancers. I haven't quite figured out how to get over or around it. Maybe it's because we feel we have to be technically better....than dancing in a social or more comfortable atmosphere?
     
  3. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    um yep...I think its the concentration on technique thing but I think it also can be that...er...well you can afford to really emote with some guy you're only going to see once in a while....
     
  4. mamboqueen

    mamboqueen Well-Known Member

    ahhh....yes, gives whole new meaning to the term "quickie!" *LOL*
     
  5. SuzieQ

    SuzieQ New Member

    LOL!!
    Yeah, but, this is with guys I see all the time at the studio--other instructors and even some of the other students. I think I'm afraid he's going to laugh at me--even though I know he wouldn't.
     
  6. Vince A

    Vince A Active Member

    SuzieQ,
    I think this is normal . . . I do the same, even after years of dancing with my longtime dance Pro, and especially with my new one.

    I had the same problem when I was 16 while driving a stickshift car in front of my Dad, even thought I was a good driver - I seemed to always stall it.

    I do the same thing in front of my blues guitar teacher . . . just mess up a lot, though I'm a very good lead guitarist!

    It's a natural thing to feel . . . "I hope!"
     
  7. SuzieQ

    SuzieQ New Member

    So do you have any insight into how to overcome it? I don't have as much problem when competing--maybe because it's a routine rather than free-style--I guess I feel like he's always watching for mistakes where the others aren't. I want the instruction, but I also want the freedom to "just dance" with him. With the others we just smile and shrug our shoulders and go on. I think it's my fault, not his, but don't know how to talk to him about it.

    And good luck with your competition, Vince! I hope you enjoy getting back to it and do well. Why did you change pros?
     
  8. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    well then i definately think its the whole instructor/student thing...sometimes I forget that I am actually an adult too...I mean a teacher is a teacher sort of like when we were kids...they know more, they are there to help you, it is your job to try to do what they say...and well, its just plain hard to do all of that respecting and trying and all the while still looking like you want to well... er ....like ya want him all at the same time....I have a positivley horrible time with this and its not b/c my pro is hard to look at...I just have hard time reminding myself that it is merely another aspect of the sell that I need to practice....I can just see the look on my family member's faces when I am caught practicing my come hither look while doing my routines...I will never hear the end of it
     
  9. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    I think you have to practice it just like everything else so that it sort of becomes automatic...I have watched this with my pro....he has a particular "hey baby" look that he throws every one of us on the "peekaboo" in the chacha...he just does it.....and its very nice:cool:
     
  10. SPratt74

    SPratt74 New Member

    Oh my gosh... SuzieQ... that is the problem that I am having!!! Ok, I'm going to describe this situation by using first letters of the names that I am talking about in hopes that you (not really the other posters, because we are in the same boat I mean) will understand my situation. Ok, first I love A & D. But I don't feel as though I'm dancing my best when I dance with them. The reason why I say this is because I dance so much better with M, N, E, and J than I do with A & D. I'm also not happy with D, because I haven't learned anything but the routine for the show.

    I'm not happy with A, because all he does is focus on the technical issues to where I don't even want to go on stage with him now, because we haven't prepared ourselves for the show. I'm seriously thinking about switching from A & D to M & N. I would go with E, but I think I'm to tall for him lol, but I love him to pieces, which is why you'll see me picking on him at our parties lol. Although I think that I scared him after our rose dance lol. Oh well lol.

    But anyways, M and N and I just all clicked and especially M and I. I told M that D set us up to do a heat in the show, and he said that he was going to ask me to do a heat with him anyways. I wish I were actually doing a routine with M, because I know that he would be so fun to do one with. N and I are also doing a heat, and the thing is that N knows how to push me, but he also knows how to have fun. We have a pretend scoreboard now as to who tops who when we dance with each other, and he knows how to win, because he'll top me by making me learn a move I don't know how to do lol. He's a blast!

    But see like you, I don't know what to do at this point. I want to switch over to M after the show, but I am so afraid of what D & A may say. I also know that M and I would make really good partners on stage, because there is just something about us when we dance that we just hit it off not like A and I or D and I. I also don't want to hurt anyone's feelings, but it's my money, you know? They can't control who I dance with when I'm paying for the lesson. Anyways, I'm so glad that you wrote this post, because I was going to write one earlier today, but I ran out of time before I had to head out the door. I'd like to know how to handle this situation myself, because I love all of them, but I want to feel as though I'm getting the best out of my money, you know?
     
  11. mamboqueen

    mamboqueen Well-Known Member

    I feel like I need an algebra refresher to read that! :)
     
  12. alemana

    alemana New Member

    aiiiEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
     
  13. SPratt74

    SPratt74 New Member

    HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Sorry about that. SuzieQ and I attend the same studio, so I knew that she would know whom I'm talking about lol. I didn't want to post actual names in case they ever came on here lol.
     
  14. mamboqueen

    mamboqueen Well-Known Member


    I see; no names to protect the innocent (or yourself!). Too funny!
     
  15. alemana

    alemana New Member

    real initials will give it away just as easily... are they real?
     
  16. SPratt74

    SPratt74 New Member

    Well yeah damn they are real lol. Oh well lol. There were to many of them that I wanted to talk about though, so I couldn't figure out how else to say it lol!;)

    MQ - That was hilarious, but it was my intention. Although, I don't think that I pulled it off well by the looks of things lol. :D
     
  17. SuzieQ

    SuzieQ New Member

    I get it: A+D+U=frustration
    M+N+E+J+U=fun
    Don't discount that some of this may be due to stress about the upcoming show.
    I will PM you!
     
  18. mamboqueen

    mamboqueen Well-Known Member

    Suzie = Algebra Goddess!
     
  19. Vince A

    Vince A Active Member

    I don't have a problem when competing, same as you. Yes, it's a routine, and I think they know what to expect from us. So, no I don't have any insight in how to overcome it. I've had it for a very log time, but you know, I've danced with other big name Pros/instructors/teachers, and I don't have that problem because they're not my teacher! Funny, eh???

    Thanks . . . this is my second procrastination about competing in six months, except this time, I'm already signed up in the Master's Division.

    I switched Pros because she is also my wife's dance coach (my wife is already a great dancer), and she (the Pro) has taken her to new levels in her dance, especially in the footwork area! If she can do just some of that with me . . . I could get hooked on dancing again!
     
  20. SuzieQ

    SuzieQ New Member

     

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