How to flirt, and why.

Discussion in 'Dancers Anonymous' started by toothlesstiger, Nov 2, 2011.

  1. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    smart men
  2. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    agree...but I think sometimes it behooves us to take the time to word things with greater care...name calling really isn't what we are after here...she wasn't saying that all men are that way...she was assessing her own experience...I have no problem with challenging her to consider her own culpability
  3. JudeMorrigan

    JudeMorrigan Well-Known Member

    To be clear, that's what I was trying to say as well. I was just added a caveat that I think people have to take individual responsiblity for putting themselves in a position where they CAN succeed. (That's actually true pretty much regardless what the goal is, of course.)

    As a fairly extreme example, there was a stretch of a couple of years before I started dancing where my life pretty much consisted of: wake up, go to work, stare at a computer screen for eight hours. Go home, stare at my home computer screen for eight hours. Sleep. Repeat. Is it any wonder that I never met anyone? It didn't matter how swell of a guy I may or may not have been. It doesn't matter if I was happily pursuing my interests. Obviously, I was never going to meet anyone that way.

    Now, I imagine most people aren't quite that hermit-like. But you get the idea. If we aren't meeting our goals, I think an important zeroth step is to step back and make an honest evaluation of whether or not we're sabotaging ourselves from the get-go.

    (And to be *perfectly* clear, if I'm calling out any members here, it's only myself. I've been falling back into some old, bad, insular habits over the last several months. I've been trying really hard the last few weeks to work on shaking myself out of them.)
  4. samina

    samina Well-Known Member

    sounds all well & good, but i bet it's related more to the oestrogenic and cannabis-related qualities of hops -- i recall a study that came out asserting that hops tend to have an aphrodisiac quality on men with a more potent sedative effect on women. hops has a potent phytoestrogen.

    the male craving for super IPAs these days could be subtly about getting hopped up in other ways. :tongue:
  5. jennyisdancing

    jennyisdancing Active Member

    Hops have an aphrodisiac quality? Isn't that called "beer goggles"? ;)
  6. Dots

    Dots Active Member

    Sure, I’ll send you a PM with the names of the site and some information.​
  7. freeageless

    freeageless Active Member

    Joe, thanks you expressed my feeling and opinions about the situation-perhaps better than I did.
  8. toothlesstiger

    toothlesstiger Well-Known Member

    Sometimes a beer is just a beer.

    And when I am inclined to drink, my choices are single-malt scotch or a heavy stout.
  9. rbazsz

    rbazsz New Member

    I didn't know about hops. Does that mean if I get some ladies from the studio to go out for a drink, I should order them an "Arrogant Bastard" ale?
  10. Zhena

    Zhena Well-Known Member

    Random data points:

    My hair stylist recently got engaged on the third anniversary of meeting her boyfriend at a Meetup. I don't have details, but she did say the Meetup was not limited to singles. I don't know her age, but she was just starting out when she first cut my hair over 20 years ago (you do the math).

    My daughter met her boyfriend in the checkout line of a supermarket ...
  11. Peaches

    Peaches Well-Known Member

    Well, #1: don't order for them...presumably they're big girls and can order for themselves. Unless, of course, you want to hammer home the arrogant bastard point.

    Personally, if I'm going to drink beer I like Raging B*tch. Heh. (And it really is a real beer!)
  12. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    my expereience of hops is the reverse..the men go to sleep...and I am all fired up...we once did a retreat and were all sipping the ale and I noticed this...and it happened more than once...not sure I like what this says about myself and the men around me :)
  13. SamSays

    SamSays New Member

    Sounds like you need to order a Brugal rum for the man instead.
  14. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    as a general rule I never order stuff with names like that, unfairly or not I assume that the name is all that is there
  15. Peaches

    Peaches Well-Known Member

    Interesting. I tried this one time when it was handed to me on the train. (Long story.) Turns out, it's actually pretty good--if you like hoppy, bitter beers. I'm not a fan of beer in general, but hoppy bitter ones I actually kind of like. Now I just get a kick out of the name.

    And, to be fair, it's made by Flying Dog Brewery. All of their names are squirrley like that (Tire Bite, Raging B*tch, In-Heat Wheat, K-9, etc.), and their beer is pretty good. It's a local brewery.
  16. samina

    samina Well-Known Member

    'zactly. :tongue:
  17. samina

    samina Well-Known Member

    lolz...

    fwiw, it does make me sleepy, but none of the men i know get that way.

    anyway...as with all things...YMMV. :)
  18. samina

    samina Well-Known Member

    dark tequila, please. or a good single malt, massive red wine, or a jamesons (thanks for that, JA). :)

    or ((insert heart emoticon))...ouzo over ice. blood will out, as they say. :tongue:
  19. jennyisdancing

    jennyisdancing Active Member

    I don't actually like beer at all. I only went to the brewery for the jazz (and, as it turned out, the men). Tried one of the craft beers but only had a few sips. That's part of what appeals to me about dancing - usually dances are alcohol-free and people have a good time without it. I'll make an exception for a summertime outdoor or beachside dance party though - bring on the piña coladas! :banana:
  20. toothlesstiger

    toothlesstiger Well-Known Member

    People who drink craft beers, single malts, and straight or on the rocks top shelf liquor are not generally there for the buzz. It gets too expensive too fast. What they are having a good time doing is sharing a taste experience with friends. And if you are knowledgeable about the drinks offered, you can get an insight into their personality based on what they drink.

    Do they insist that the most expensive stuff tastes the best just because it is expensive? Are they constantly trying different beers? Do they stick within a particular range of beers? Do they stick to one obscure brew, and then grumble when it becomes popular with other people? Do they stick to the cheap stuff, but drink in moderation?

Share This Page