pygmalion's dating advice thread

Discussion in 'Dancers Anonymous' started by pygmalion, Jun 11, 2010.

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  1. etp777

    etp777 Active Member

    Heh, I make no claim on understanding the other side of it. I just know I've tried for years to explain this to various gfs, and never been able to make them get it. just wish all women would accept they won't understand it and stop asking me to try to explain how we can like each other, respect each other, get along, and there's still that little bit of fear/disapproval. :)
     
  2. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member

    Yep. Men tend to be more direct about things, in my experience. :cool:
     
  3. flashdance

    flashdance Active Member

    Just found an auction on eBay selling 150 valentines cards.. think that might scare her off :lol:

    Oooh found an online card sending thingy! :D

    If this works I'll fill an entire floor with flowers for her ;)
     
  4. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member


    Which is why I don't introduce guys to my Dad unless I think it's the real thing. Not worth the angst.

    But, as a parent, I do get why the angst exists.

    Incidentally, my "dating advice" to DS? "DS. She's not going to be your girlfriend if you don't ask her." This about The Giirl he's had a crush on since third grade. My son is nothing if not loyal. Just like his mom. Not sure that's a good thing, but it is what it is. :)
     
  5. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    i guess that is one good thing about have a dad and a step dad who were nver really interested enough in me to give a fig
     
  6. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member


    My Dad is 87 and gives a lot of figs, especially now. The next guy I introduce to my Dad had better be golden or he's gonna get his butt kicked by an almost nonagenarian. (sp?) :lol:
     
  7. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member


    One day at a time. :)
     
  8. etp777

    etp777 Active Member

    One valentine a day? You'll be set for five months and certainly have made an impression. :)
     
  9. wooh

    wooh Well-Known Member

    Yep. My parents LOVE LOVE LOVE my husband. My dad especially, thinks he's the son he never had. My in-laws, well, they accept that their baby boy got married. To a tramp. Who was (gasp!) married before!! And I'll say, while we were dating, there were a few conversations about, "So once we're married, who comes first, her or me?????" Because while dating, it was always her. The apron strings were not cut until the wedding day. But thankfully, it was a pretty clean cut.
     
  10. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member

    My brother never married. Good thing for his various girlfriends over the years. My Mom is a crazy, possessive witch when it comes to her only son. And passive aggressive too. :lol:

    My Dad. Well. He's pretty mellow, comparatively speaking, but still up for a good butt-kicking, should the boyfriend circumstances require it. :lol:

    I am very lucky to have the parents I have. Very lucky.
     
  11. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    wooh...I love you but I gotcha on the M-in-law from hades... let me assure you...this public forum can't handle the magnitude of my mother in law stories, nor would anyone beleive them if I told them...someday we must meet and I will tell you about it......anyhow, my mom loved my hubby...as I said neither dad cared enough about anything but themselves to weigh in on it..., father in law was also fine with me, but, like you, mother in law was pretty much on a psychotic bender for the first 15 years of the marriage...she has now given up...but caused a massive amount of mayhem during the first decade...
     
  12. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    passive aggressive is just so cowardly...I'd much rather just overtly scare the hell out of them:)...in truth, given the hell I have been though...my view is to keep my mouth shut unless I see that my boy is unhappy the majority of the time...and then there will be a conversation...otherwise, ain't none of my business...another thing about losing a child is that you are so glad to have them that you don't need to micro manage their life
     
  13. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member

    Yes. P-A is cowardly, in my view.

    And, in defense of my mom. she never read a book about psychology. She was too busy raising seven kids in the 50's, 60's, 70's and 80's. So she has no idea how un-enlightened she is.


    In her world, you protect your kids, whatever it takes. I'm here to tell ya that she has protected me and my siblings at her own expense more times than I can count and she will continue to do so until she can't anymore.

    That is my Mom good and bad. God love her. I know I do, manipulation notwithstanding. She's doing the best she can, which is pretty damn good, by my estimation. :cool:
     
  14. wooh

    wooh Well-Known Member

    I do have to say that most problems with my in-laws aren't really about mother-in-law. It's mostly the judgemental sister-in-law that nobody thought to tell, "Get over it and go to your brother's wedding." Of course, talking on the phone with my mom a while ago, we've deduced that my in-laws are actually Russian spies, part of a Baptist terrorist sleeper cell. All of the sudden, everything made sense. :p

    Of course, my dad's family HATED my mom. After all, even though he'd already moved 5 states away before meeting my mom, it was still supposedly all her fault that their little boy moved so far away. It actually was so bad that once I was a teenager, they'd be rude to me, since I'm so much like my mom. My mom and I see how much my baby sister's in-laws LOVE her and we're just so confused. Didn't know that was possible! :)
     
  15. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member

    In laws are hard.

    Thank goodness my first FIL was deceased (GRHS) and MIL couldn't speak English.

    Heaven help me now. The Guy has an alive and kicking Momma that he visits on major holidays. And an ex-wife. And two kids. :shock: Oh! Dear Lord. :lol:
     
  16. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member

    Okay. I get it. Just shag The Guy, P. And don't think I haven't considered... DS will be away at camp and/or with his loser Dad for six weeks this summer :raisebro:

    But that said, despite the title, this thread is not all about me. Just curious. I mentioned yesterday a couple times that I have two top-of-the-list, drop dead, must have, criteria for romantic interests -- intelligence and chemistry.

    Until yesterday, I pretty much assumed that everybody was the same, but I got glimmerings from a few that it's not the case.

    Just curious. What are your drop-dead, must-haves?
     
  17. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    honesty, responsibility, intelligence, compatible spiritually and politically, non-smoking and no drug use
     
  18. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    I would never advocate just shagging..unless a person was very unconditional about what they expected after that and confident that it wouldn't create a hope or an attachment on account of it...which frankly, i doubt would even be possible for me..
     
  19. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member

    I was just kidding. I do have plans for The Guy that involve ... ya know ... nudity. :oops: And there are four weeks between now and the time DS leaves for band camp and six weeks after ... :lol:

    But you're right. End of the day, I have to live with me, and randomly sleeping with someone, even someone I've had a crush on for more than a year, is not me. :cool:


    I do plan to use those six weeks to get to know more about myself and The Guy. And we'll see. :)
     
  20. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    that part is entirely your business :)...just sharing my view on what I think the consequences would be for me....I mean, I have been know to develop attaments from waltzing...I seriously doubt I could get nekkid w/ someone then just wish them well and let it be...just me...for better or worse, I don't think i am wired that way...it is too far off from my perspective on why I would have intercourse in the first place...I can appreciate thsat others have vastly different views on it
     
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