Say "No" when you don't like

Discussion in 'Ballroom Dance' started by dlgodud, Jan 29, 2009.

  1. emeralddancer

    emeralddancer Active Member

    I whine and moan and groan, but eventually give in. He seems to know my potential better than I do. (Which it IS a good thing, as this is just still ALL so new)

    Honestly though, if it something that I am not really comfortable with, he modifies it for me or does something different, then revisit it later.
  2. dlgodud

    dlgodud Active Member


    Yes. This is one of things that I worry about. I've read postings regarding this issue and that's one of reason I posted this question.
  3. Chiron

    Chiron New Member

    I do whatever my pro tells me to do, I figure she knows better than me. If it is a move I don't like I figure I'm not very good at it. If I'm not good at it, it targets an area of my dancing that is weak. If I can make my weaknesses strengths then I'll become that much better of a dancer, but hey I'm masochistic.
  4. tanya_the_dancer

    tanya_the_dancer Well-Known Member

    I think it is different for a leader. Even though she's a teacher, ultimately at the competition you have to lead it and she will have to follow, whatever it was. And as a follower, I eventually have to do whatever is coming my way.
  5. etp777

    etp777 Active Member

    That's certainly true. Least, hopefully she'll follow. guess that depends on my lead. ;)
  6. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    now there is where i disagree...;)...I make unintentional executive decisions about what we are going to do all of the time
  7. jjs914

    jjs914 Active Member

    I agree with this. Usually DP and I will try whatever our teachers give us for some time. If, after practicing and competing something for awhile it feels awkward, or we feel it's not the best step for us, we'll go back and modify. I think it's good for routines to evolve anyway....
  8. pinkstuff

    pinkstuff Member

    I tend to do whatever steps my pro feels I should do. Having persisted with the ones I loathe, I think I've learnt something from them (despite still hating them) & am a stronger dancer as a result. Doesn't mean I don't quibble about it sometimes, I just tend to lose the argument ;)
  9. 2totango

    2totango New Member

    That is exactly how my lessons/competitions work. Eventually, I give up because between the two of us, my pro is more stubborn than I am AND he is actually the instructor!
  10. danceronice

    danceronice Well-Known Member

    Whining at them will only guarantee we spend all 45 minutes on whatever it is I hate.

    It's a really effective way of getting me not to whine.
  11. emeralddancer

    emeralddancer Active Member

    Can TOTALLY agree with this.
  12. emeralddancer

    emeralddancer Active Member

    So decided tonight NOT to complain AT ALL!

    Makes it much more productive, in that vein, I think I will just NOT complain, or moan or groan about anything anymore. I will just DO what he says, when he says it. (will be a most difficult task, but hey I am up for the challenge! LOL)

    It is amazing when your instructor really can see what is best.
  13. elisedance

    elisedance New Member

    Our lessons are actually exactly the opposite - pro works up an (open) routine and we work on it for a few lessons - then he says 'I'm taking out so-and-so step'; I say, 'why' and he says 'cause its not working' and then I whine 'no, we can do it, its possible, I like it,... yada yada yada'
  14. wooh

    wooh Well-Known Member

    I am big on arguing, (especially with male instructors, I have a serious problem with male authority), but in the end, I make myself try anything for at least a while. And I'm forcing myself more and more to argue less and "just do it" more. Strange how much better that works.:rolleyes:
  15. elisedance

    elisedance New Member

    And keeps the males happy BTW... (caver :p)
  16. waltzguy

    waltzguy Active Member

    Why not say no to certain figures. As long as it's done in a polite and meaningful way.

    And this solution is non-gender-specific. :)
  17. Laura

    Laura New Member

    My teacher has Bronze, Silver, Gold, and three different Open students who dance two different sets of choeography. So that's five sets of routines right there, PLUS his own Pro routines. I like to be easy to deal with, so I'll go with anything that he comes up with. So far he's always remembered my routines in competitions, but sometimes in lessons he'll go off and do someone else's. But it's all good to me, really. I figure if I can stay with it no matter what he's doing, then I'm really dancing for real!
  18. Laura

    Laura New Member

    My Pilates teacher often takes this approach. Because of it, I can now do Tendon Stretch -- including the version where you push the carriage all the way out with your feet and lower yourself on your arms so you butt goes below that bar on the reformer -- and do multiple reps with style and grace. I used to cry when I couldn't even do the first approximation (just bending over into position) and whine that I despised that move. So...taking my medicine...it works for me.
  19. latingal

    latingal Moderator Staff Member

    As others have said in other posts, since the pro currently knows more about choreography in the dances than I, I prefer to take whatever choreography the pro gives me and MAKE it look good, whether I like it or not.

    I take it as a personal challenge to learn the technique and the characteristic of that movement and rock it until it's dead, dead, dead! If after a year or so of trying it still looks like crap, well then I might ask for a change - though by that time the pro is normally ready to take it out anyway.
  20. Laura

    Laura New Member

    Yeah, I've had a few things moved/changed 'cause I just couldn't make them look good and the Pro was tired of me looking crummy.

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