Student Challenges Prevalent in the Pro-am Structure

I think I've said something like this before, but imagine you were, say, an accountant. You spend all day, 5 or 6 days a week auditing books for many companies. Do you think you'd want to go home and spend your leisure time auditing the books for your neighbor's small business?

I don't know that that is a valid comparison. Presumably, ballroom professionals are ballroom professionals because they love ballroom dancing. If it's just a job, there are other jobs that pay a lot better.

If I was to compare, I'll give you two examples from my own experience. Software development. Certainly, there are a programmers that punch the clock. But the field is full of people that do it for fun outside of work. They write code for an employer during the day, and they write stuff that is fun for them in their off hours.

Another is science. Without fail, every physicist I knew practically required threats to stop doing physics. You can tell physicists have been in the bar by looking at the napkins littered with calculations.

That physics example is really relevant, I think. The hard work, the long years struggling to get some job security, the overall poor pay... You don't become a professional physicist unless you really love it, are obsessed with it, and can't imagine doing anything else. That's why I'm NOT a physicist now, I didn't love it enough to offset the sacrifice involved in pursuing it.

How many people do accounting for fun when they get home from work? Probably a lot less than dance.

I have to agree with Toothlesstiger. I think there are aspects of ANY job that will feel like a job. But I think more often than not, if we are fortunate enough to be doing what we love, we can't help but let it invade our lives regardless of where we are and who we are with (be that with students who do not dance at the same level, other pros, etc.).

And the whole pro-am issue in my opinion is not that unique to ballroom dancing. Certain aspects are different of course, but the general idea can resonate across multiple professions. For example, I have a doctorate degree in my field. I also serve as an adjunct professor for one of the universities in my city. I can tell you that it takes an enormous amount of patience and a special desire to teach students of any subject. And on some days, and especially with some students, I am just so not in the mood to work with someone whose skill set is so far beneath my own, given that I have been doing my job at a a level considered top of my field for 10 plus years. I suspect it is the same for dance pros. One major difference being of course that I am training these students to do this for a living, whereas dance pros are training students for the students' perception of "fun" and not as a means of supporting themselves later (usually). Therefore, the motivations of my students are different. I get that. But it still does not change the fact that I LOVE my job, inept students and all. And if I reach a point where I don't, I would like to think I will call the university and tell them not to send me any more students.

Excellent points. Enjoying dance for itself is really only possible when you do it on your own terms. No one wants to be treated like a trained monkey.

I like Larinda's description of the dancing at her wedding party, and that feeling is what I am referring to. Is it possible to have that kind of "fun feeling" when we are on the competition floor? Yes, we can have passion, a sense of accomplishment, and enjoy ourselves, but I do like the feeling of fun that comes with movement to music, and it can be hard to be in touch with that side during lessons and competition. The moment I start to embrace that side.. invariably there are errors made in technique or connection.

LOL, I am an actuary, and many in my profession do take great pleasure in using their modeling and software skills on things not directly related to work... I'm not as extreme but let's just say I have a hefty number of personal spreadsheets and databases. So it depends on the person.

Regarding dance, upon re-reading, perhaps I inferred an "I don't enjoy dance" sentiment that wasn't intended to be there. I was very affected by the athlete poster - "most of us hate it" - maybe took it too literally. This is what happens when you have to interpret insurance contracts as part of your job...

And it's true, the more advanced you get, there are different things that are fun. The more you know, the more you realize how much you don't know and it's easy to get discouraged and forget to have fun. So sometimes I just let loose and have fun even if it's not my best dancing (like the wedding reference).

Had a dance event yesterday - not exactly a comp but structured like one so many of the same dynamics being addressed in this thread.

Yes problem is when you go to these socials etc you are expected to do stuff like dancing with everyone who ask. Sometimes I just want to meet up and chat with friends while watching and enjoying the venue. Sometimes I want to just dance with DP, sometimes I don't want to dance at all, sometimes I want to dance with a couple of friends beginners or not.

But then you are branded that snobbish antisocial comp dancer who doesnt want to dance with beginners. So I stop going.

I am doing am-am atm but increasingly curious of doing pro-am. My friend do pro-am and it seems like there can be intense rivalries between students sometimes. Who gets the better choreography, who gets more time, etc.

Pshh, don't let them stop you. Several of my dance friends (might?) be seen this way at local dances, aside from a few regulars we're friendly with. Do we care? Not really. We're there to dance. If someone I don't want to dance with thinks I'm a snob, that's their problem.

Some folks describe their practices, lessons and coaching in terms, that I have to wonder what they are getting out of it. The descriptions almost make it sound like dancing has become the job, and if you're a student, one you're paying dearly for.

This, exactly. To put it another way - Olympic athletes pay dearly for their training, work their butts off, often get frustrated and discouraged and injured and go through phases where it feels like a job...and they do it because they love it. Dance is the same for me. I wouldn't have it any other way. Very little worth having is easy...when it is, we don't often appreciate it like we appreciate those things that take hard work and effort. Because pro/am is so much more self-focused, I think, than other ways of dancing and competing, I think you get even more of this molding-into-an-athlete student/coach dynamic. Doesn't mean for a second that there is any less love or joy involved.

Or, to put it yet another way...I hear people complain about their spouses all the time...doesn't mean they don't love them any less. In fact, it usually is just the opposite.

I imagine that'll vary from student to student and instructor to instructor. In my own case, my fellow students and I are all proud members of Team [Instructor] and are more of a mutual support structure than we are rivals. For me, it's actually an *advantage* of the pro-am structure.

Of course, the way things have worked out, we haven't had any cases yet where more than one student was wanting to do a particular event (ie, scholarships) at a given competition. I actually expect that to change somewhat next year, and while I expect us to manage just fine, I can definitely see how to could be a challenge to deal with in the long run.

hahaha - awesome comparison!

I get this. Ballroom is the most challenging, enlightening, frustrating, and rewarding thing I've ever done. It is a lot of hard work and though I enjoy it, I rarely feel I can call it "fun". Some days it literally makes me crazy, but it also makes me happier than I've ever been. I wouldn't trade it or change it for anything.