Why don't guys dance?

Discussion in 'Ballroom Dance' started by dancin_feet, Mar 10, 2004.

  1. toothlesstiger

    toothlesstiger Well-Known Member

    I suppose that depends on where. I see that so infrequently that I can name the two men I know of in the past dozen years.
     
  2. mjnemeth

    mjnemeth Member

    Spouse, wife and husband, taking lesson and going to dance alone? I do that a lot, because, its basic one or two dance and she sits down with inhaler for 20 minutes. That kind thing mightmight be why husband don't go. Sad story , took shag lesson a year ago, and there was a couple there, older than us, he just couldn't remember enough :(.
     
  3. opendoor

    opendoor Well-Known Member

    Yes, it´s the norm in my scene (tango and salsa). So much difficulties do regularly arise when couples start dancing, learning and practicing together. It does not concern parties, but the regularly work. So (including me) most dancers got their own dancepartner besides their partner.
     
  4. Wolfgang

    Wolfgang Member


    You misunderstood.
    The boy toy's not Brad Pitt and my former teacher LOVED my (semi-) joke.
    Knew exactly what I was getting at, too.

    In regards to married people going to dance lessons/studios by themselves, happens all the time, especially if they are 'serious' dancers.
    Which is a completely different thing from married people going dancing by themselves, meaning in bars, clubs, etc.
    Also happens a lot, but for totally different reasons.
    Night clubs are quite the minefield.

    The male-to-female ratio is definitely NOT more balanced in the Country scene, it's exactly the same as in all the other scenes. At least 5 men for every woman,etc.
    Country Line Dancing is where you'll find lots more women than men. What kind of women is another matter entirely......
     
  5. Hank

    Hank Member

    My rates of being rejected at social dances vary widely among dance styles:

    Salsa: twice/hour
    Ballroom: once/5 hours
    Argentine Tango: once/10 hours
    Lindy: once/50 hours
    Country: once/75 hours
    West Coast Swing: once/500 hours
    Balboa: never been rejected

    Unsurprisingly, over the years, I’ve moved away from dances where my presence isn’t valued and toward dances where it is valued.
     
  6. toothlesstiger

    toothlesstiger Well-Known Member

    hehe,
    Who I ask has changed over the years. I'm married now. I don't ask pretty, young girls to dance unless we are already friends and/or other men aren't asking them to dance. So it's been quite many years since I have been rejected for a dance.
     
  7. opendoor

    opendoor Well-Known Member

    Interesting! Of course salsa is the most and Swing is the least flirty community. That could make sense.
     
  8. PyroStock

    PyroStock New Member

    If by "seen as MUCH more of a 'leader'" you mean a 12year old (girl/boy) who equates to the word leader with cool then yes. More attractive because it's more popular/cool then yes. Every player is a leader in hockey/football/rugby/basketball??? No, that's not how it works.

    True, but that doesn't change the perception that soccer is sometimes seen as a girl's game in America anymore than the perception that dancing is sometimes seen as a girl's hobby in America.
     
  9. Wolfgang

    Wolfgang Member

    In my experience, the real-life difference between 12-year old girls and 45-year old girls is remarkably small.

    The reasons why soccer isn't popular in the US are very simple:
    1)Advertisers hate the fact that they have to hush for 2 x 45 minutes, which they feel robs them of many opportunities to rake the consumer over the coals.
    2)Most sports that are very popular in America tend to emphasize height and body size.
    Your basketball playting days after high school will be numbered if you're not at least 6'2, in football, not only do you have to be at least 6'2, you also have to weigh a minimum of 200 pounds, or you will be crushed like bug under a bulldozer the first time 6 linebackers (@ 350 lbs. each, that's high school weight.....) pile on top of you.
    Even sports in which height or size don't necessarily matter - baseball, hockey, tennis, etc. - have in recent years been going in the direction of the super-tall body builder.
    Americans have a hard time seeing a person of average build as an 'athlete'. This ties in nicely with what I said above about 12-year old girls.....Or their moms, for that matter.
    In soccer, being 6'5 doesn't give you an advantage (not even as a goalkeeper), and weighing 250 lbs. is definitely not in your favor.....
    Look at all the tremendous success of teams from Latin America and southern Europe, most of which are composed primarily of rather slender guys of average or below average height.
     
  10. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    I think it borders on the offensive to make a blanket statement about the judgement of all 12 year old girls and all 45 year old women being nearly identical....am not going to argue it...merely stating my view
     
  11. samina

    samina Well-Known Member

    what nonsense. not offended over here, though a bit more enlightened as to wolfgang's general experiences with women...
     
  12. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    personally, not going to bother being offended...but think it borders nonetheless
     
  13. Steve Pastor

    Steve Pastor Moderator Staff Member

    Coming late to this...
    I go dancing at a club here in Portland called Bushwhackers. Then there's Stoney's in Las Vegas and Cowboy Country in Long Beach, CA, which I visit occassionally.
    Can't define "more balanced," but I can usually find someone to dance with most of the time. Things change from night to night, song to song, etc just like anywhere else I've been.

    And yes, these places are constantly having dance lessons and there always seem to be newbies walking in the door.
    So, yeah, there's lots of dancing and many guys don't do line dancing, but wait for the partner dances.

    Go to the Saddle Rack and see for yourself (only been there once a long time ago).
     
  14. Joe

    Joe Well-Known Member

    Hyperbole, much?
     
  15. toothlesstiger

    toothlesstiger Well-Known Member

    I always found that making a woman feel special, and making her laugh, get a lot more mileage in the long run than any physical attributes one has. Any man who thinks otherwise might consider whether their presentation, rather than their physical appearance, is the greater impediment to their romantic desires. And whether perhaps they've been fishing in the wrong pond...
     
  16. danceronice

    danceronice Well-Known Member

    Wise words.
     
  17. soulfire12

    soulfire12 New Member

    Lol.. most of them just love to observe ;) wait n watch as they call it :D
     
  18. Warren J. Dew

    Warren J. Dew Well-Known Member

    The problem is, you have to get through the short run before you can get to the long run.
     
  19. ajiboyet

    ajiboyet Well-Known Member

    I think sometimes you can hit the long run immediately...
     
  20. toothlesstiger

    toothlesstiger Well-Known Member

    That is what your teens and early twenties are for. If we are talking about romance, of course.

    If we are talking about dancing, there is only the short term. You just keep asking ladies to dance, and don't take it personally if they say no.

    If all the ladies are always taken (hmm, I know some ladies on this forum would like to visit such a place) go someplace else to dance, or bring a partner with you. When the other ladies see that your partner is having fun dancing with you, they are starting to see some of YOUR fine qualities...

    While understandable in the young, too much focus on the short run in romance is shallow at best.
     

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