Ballroom Dance > Why don't guys dance?

Discussion in 'Ballroom Dance' started by dancin_feet, Mar 10, 2004.

  1. Sagitta

    Sagitta Well-Known Member

    I get an inate joy from moving to the music, however, I do want to dance with someone otherwise I can do what I normally do at home and stay at home.
  2. Pacion

    Pacion New Member

    :shock: ROTFL :lol: Warren, are you married or do you have a significant other? If not, would you mind if I proposed to you one leap year :wink: :lol:

    One of the "encouraging" things a former dance teacher would say is that dance is one of the few activities where a man could touch/hold a woman on her back/waist and NOT fear getting smacked for doing so :lol: All the more reason for men taking up dancing. If said man is already in a relationship, then there is no need for him to be/want to take up dancing is there :? but then again, that might be a generalisation :wink:

    Oh yes! The dance world is full of stories of guys who say they took up dancing because they wanted to impress a certain young lady and even though the friendship came to an end, they remember and are "grateful" to this certain young lady. Therefore, at the risk of making YET another generalisation, I think it could be suggested that a number of men take up dancing (that is, if they didn't grow up with it) for reasons connected to the ego more than their "feminine side" :?

    This may be a generalisation but it looks like the above comment could also be applied to... not taking out the garbage, not putting down the toilet seat and not putting the cap on the toothpaste... :roll: or am I being mischievous :wink: :lol:
  3. rails

    rails New Member

    I think that's true. I like the example in the article:

    I think this is just as true today as it was then. The consequences of being a bad dancer are more serious for men than for women. Generally speaking.
  4. Pacion

    Pacion New Member

    I also suspect that if you were to ask a grandfather what made him take up dancing in the first place (if he didn't not grow up with it), I have a feeling that he will say that he wanted to impress a sweet little thing, even if she was a few years old then him and or was his older sister's best friend. :wink:
  5. lim_96

    lim_96 New Member

    Hi, I just discovered this forum. Your question as to why there are so few men dance is only true for ballroom dance not disco. I think mainly because men doesn't want to deal with the pressure.

    If you come to California, USA, you will find lots of men to dance with. :D
  6. tacad

    tacad New Member

    Hi lim_96. Welcome to the Dance-Forums. :D So I take it that you dance disco? I like to watch it but have a difficult time doing it.
  7. Sagitta

    Sagitta Well-Known Member

    Welcome lim_96. :)
  8. lim_96

    lim_96 New Member

    Hi Tacad,

    I am not into disco. I only disco once in a long while. I actually just started to learn ballroom dance on and off about 3 years ago and enjoyed it very much. :shock:

    I found ballroom dancing extremely challenging because as a guy you have to not only remembering the steps but you also have to lead and choreograph at the same time. What's worse is that the beat of the music does not seem to allow you time to do all that and look good while doing it. :headwall: I am not very good at it yet and still trying to learn when I have the time.
  9. Sonny

    Sonny New Member

    I think most men donot dance because they are afraid of failure and rejection. Imagine getting on the floor trying to get to know a lady and thinking to yourself how bad, un-coordinated, unrythmic, etc. I look. Most men donot handle rejection and failure very well. Why risk it when you can be part of the majority of men who don't dance.
  10. mamboqueen

    mamboqueen Well-Known Member

    ...because the guys that can dance get all the girls!! :D

    Seriously, men are not the only ones who have confidence issues. My teacher always tells me that his female students are incredibly hard on themselves, always finding something wrong with their dancing or their bodies. We are at an advantage because you guys have to do the leading, so your missteps are more apparent, for the most part.

    If you truly enjoy doing it, keep at it. Like any other discipline, it just takes lots of time and practice (and a few bucks!).

    Welcome to the forum!
  11. Sagitta

    Sagitta Well-Known Member

    What Mamboqueen says is true!!

    And welcome to df Sonny. Glad to have you. :D
  12. Doug

    Doug New Member

    I think that I have commented on this before, but it bears saying again. In my experience, men seem to have a much harder time just getting the most basic steps. And so even men who do give dance a chance tend to become discourged sooner and drop out sooner than women. We teach Lindy & Balboa and begin every class with one or two songs of just basic footwork (& I do mean basic!) ala aerobics class. The men struggle a LOT more than the women and take weeks to get what the women seem to get in the first class or two.
  13. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member

    Hmm. I wonder why, Doug. :?
  14. Sonny

    Sonny New Member

    Let's see what response we get with this reason why most men don't dance.

    Alot of ladies tend to change personality after you know them for while. For a man to learn to dance he has to spend quite some time with one in a difficult situation at best. Maybe most men don't dance because they can't or won't take the verbal punishment required to learn to dance. :roll: :shock: :(
  15. Sagitta

    Sagitta Well-Known Member

    I just don't understand this. :?

    Those whom I know are not like this at all.
  16. new-ish

    new-ish New Member

    I started on vacation a couple of years ago. I was staying at the Club Med in Cancun Mexico and thought that the woman I was chasing said she was going to the ballroom latin class they had at the time.

    She didn't show up, but I'm still taking lessons. :?
  17. dTas

    dTas New Member

    nope... don't agree... this implies that you have to have the same dance partner for an extended amount of time in order to learn how to dance. that's the only way you're going to notice the change of personality.

    i don't think its because of the personality changes but i do think there is some merrit to the "verbal punnishment". men has big soft egos and don't want to be embarrased, don't want to look stupid, don't want to feel clumsy. thus... they don't dance.
  18. tj

    tj New Member

    I'd put it this way - the initial learning curve for guys is daunting. Add in that students often beat each other up by pointing fingers and blaming... and well, it can frustrate guys to the point of quitting.

    One solution is to find yourself fellow classmates/instructors/studios who will encourage you in your dancing rather than discourage you.

    Everyone has a different way of learning. I'd recommend going to different places until you find yourself an environment which suits you best.
  19. blue

    blue New Member

    Both genders do this. I am very bad at taking it, too.
  20. tj

    tj New Member

    I remember when I was first learning to dance, that I was having problems getting the beat. After practicing it for a while, I felt like I was finally getting the hang of it, and what happens? The sister of the gal that I was dancing with started to critique both of us. I was like :cry: and my partner told me to not mind her sister cuz she's mean.

    And yeah, looking back at it, it was kinda mean.

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