Women asking men to dance.

Discussion in 'General Dance Discussion' started by Spitfire, Oct 20, 2003.

  1. Lioness

    Lioness Well-Known Member

    You are welcome to PM me if you want to discuss this more, but I'd just like to say that, especially in cases of assault and abuse, women are often NOT listened to.
    Feminism is not about snuffing out men's voices.
    leee likes this.
  2. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    don't feed the :troll:
  3. Generalist

    Generalist Active Member

    Good one dude -- I can't stop laughing!
  4. Soulmate61

    Soulmate61 Active Member

    in many regions of America, a troll wasting reader time with ridiculous fabrication is the surest and quickest way for him to get kicked out of a forum.
  5. cornutt

    cornutt Well-Known Member

    So to get this thread back on topic... I have noticed that sometimes women who ask tend to get keyed on one or a handful of partners, and they ask those few partners a bit more than they should. I guess it's the same trap that men, particularly newbie men, fall into: They get to know a few partners that they know they can ask and not get their heads bitten off, and then because it's comfortable, they don't expand their horizons beyond that point. It's flattering to be asked repeatedly by someone, but, you know, I like to get around. :cool: Seriously, I think it's just a matter of first getting used to asking, and then using the people you know to expand your network. Dance with one of your regular partners, and then at the end of it, ask him, "Hey, if I ask Joe over there, do you think he'd be OK with that?" Having said that, I will say that I don't know any men that would get offended over being asked by a woman. Surprised, maybe. :p
  6. Wolfgang

    Wolfgang Member

    Which is precisely why I recommend going out into the real world - beyond studios, beyond 'socials' beyond 'practice parties', etc.
    You will get your head bitten off, how often and in how many different ways depends on your height, looks, age and perceived financial/social status.
    After several dozen/hundreds/thousands of such encounters with the sweet, innocent and fair, you will realize you didn't need that head after all and they can have it.
    Hit the clubs 3 nights a week for a year or so and never again will any type of rejection bother you in the least.
  7. juwest333

    juwest333 Active Member

    I left the nightclub scene because I found it to be sleazy and a place where a bunch of men were going after a bunch of women (generally speaking) for that "one thing." I guess I was odd in this regard because I honestly just wanted to dance sometimes. I started doing Lindy and attending social dances almost two years ago and I have only been to a club once (friend invited me) since then and I don't miss it not one bit. But I digress...

    I know exactly how you feel about wanting to get around. There are a handful of women at my scene who are either intimidated by many of the male leads or don't get asked by them, so they repeatedly ask me for dances (What can I say? I'm approachable. It's all in the smile. :) ). Although it would be nice if I could get around to dance with others at times, I'm never actually offended by it or anything like that.
    danceronice likes this.
  8. cornutt

    cornutt Well-Known Member

    Once in a blue moon I have to say, "Can I get you for the next one? I already promised this one", so I can get free to go ask someone that I haven't danced with yet. But it's a good problem to have. :cool:
  9. tanya_the_dancer

    tanya_the_dancer Well-Known Member

    Well, it's kinda easier to ask people you already know. I don't decline when someone asks me, but if I am asking a guy (which I prefer not to do), it will be someone I already know. Either someone who previously asked me, or someone I know from elsewhere (I.e. from a group class we both take).
  10. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    yep...women, by neccessity, especially if they are alone, have learned to be more cautious

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