Discussion in 'Dancers Anonymous' started by fascination, May 10, 2009.
Sat - 4 hrs of work, church service, grocery shopping, blog post
Gotcha. I wasn't trying to sum up the complexity of your view in a fraction of a sentence, but yeah. We've talked about this before, IIRC in the context of long term relationships and the ebb and flow of being "in love." I do understand where you're coming from, I think. I'm 100% with you that our actions are a decision (I used the word choice, but I think the two are close enough to the same thing.)
I'm not so sure about the emotions piece of it, though. Would be interesting to hear others' views, although I suppose that conversation probably belongs in the enlightenment thread (which gives me hives. lol)
My GF and her ex had four children and twenty-something years of marriage plus a life's work together. I can't imagine how difficult it would be for her to let go of that and move on. I wish she was able to. But, in all honesty, knowing some of the things she has endured, I am in awe of how far she has come. All I can do is support her through this next phase as best I can. *sigh*
Back to correct myself. This probably isn't relevant to most folks, but the To Kill a Mockingbird Fathom Event is not exclusively at AMC theaters. It's at a variety of theaters all over the US. I found this out because I've decided to give my parents tickets as an anniversary gift. TKAM is one of their all-time favorite movies, and they've never seen it in a theater. When the movie came out, Mum and Dad had a house full of kids and were too poor to afford a night out at the movies.
Their 64th anniversary is on November 11 and I hadn't chosen a gift yet. Dinner and a movie, plus an overnight hotel stay and some gift cards for shopping. (PUs live in the boonies and would have to go to the big city for this.) Nice.
I think these things are never complete, they are "less severe"...with less frequent triggers....people leave imprints on one another....
Yes to this.
Up pretty early; DH is gone. Shrug. Call him--he's taking a drive. OK.
For some reason I wake up with lots of energy. Get up, take shower, get dressed, put on makeup--unheard of for a weekend morning. (Usually, all that happens in mid-afternoon, if it happens at all.) Head downstairs, eat leftovers for breakfast, and start on a whirlwind of house straightening.
DH arrives home. Minor tiff. Make up. Prep for storm, which means putting planters against the house and bringing in/wedging deck furniture. Shrug.
We also get to having a financial talk. We have these now and again--sort of a state of the financial union, tweaking of goals and priorities, etc. It's important, since I'm the one who handles our day-to-day finances and DH is mostly out of the loop. We have some minor disagreements, as we always do when it comes to finances, because he and I tend to think about things slightly differently. But we keep talking, and playing with the numbers (when we have financial talks, we break out the budget worksheet in Excel, a couple of calculators, an online amortization calculator, and several pens and a notebook), and brainstorming, and we eventually arrive at a good arrangement. It's not terribly different from what we're doing currently--not paying things off much faster--but we've got a very concrete goal, and we have agreed on our financial priorities, and have agreed on how we'd handle several possible contingencies. In the end, we both managed to get what we want: we've got a 5-year plan for paying off almost all of our debt, we've got a way to reduce the amount of interest we pay, we've got money being set aside for savings for new cars in a few years/vacation (the fact we haven't had a good vacation in 5+ years is a sore spot)/emergencies, and we're putting more money into retirement. Yay us!!!
Piddle about restlessly for a bit in the afternoon, then head out to have dinner with friends and friend's family for friend's birthday. Have a really great time; good food, lots of good conversation. Head home happy, full, caffeinated, and slightly over-stimulated.
Get home, awake...piddle about restlessly until I manage to force myself to quasi-sleep.
So I haven't been on in a week (again), but I think I can summarize briefly.
SUNDAY--Revisited Harry Potter World to drink in every last detail. Re-rode Flight of the Hippogriff twice (once all by ourselves) and re-toured Hogwarts Castle. Also visited the Jurassic Park section of Universal.
Had lunch poolside while Child swam. I had a turkey burger and fries. I can't even think when I last had a burger and fries before that!
Flew home to MD.
-Worked. Some days were long (e.g., Monday was 8:30-7 PM) to make up for not having been at work Thurs. and Fri.
-Child picked up a cold on the airplane and wound up staying home from school on Tuesday, but since Husband works from home--and owes me a lot of childcare hours from his recent 6-day trip--I was still able to put in a full day, which I needed to do.
-Thursday I had a double Nik lesson, my last pre-comp lessons.
-I also had VagMon rehearsal that night and got an extra part assigned to me, which makes me happy. (It's actually called Happy Fact.)
-Friday at 6:45 PM--Drove to Parsippany, NJ after work and a spray tan appt. This was a little bit of a tiring task as Child had had a bad dream and joined me in bed at 5:30 AM--and I had gone to bed after midnight, which I normally try not to do on work days. Oh well! I listened to the audiobook I had purchased on my trip earlier in the month to Paramus, NJ to help keep me alert.
sunday..still feeling pretty nostalgic about having practiced at FP's studio the previous night...nice to be able to occasionally cross each other's path once again in a better way...even got a few minutes of cha together during the group which was-- bizarre-- to say the least....spend most of the early part of sunday doing various house chores...touch base with dh who returns from golf outing...he had a blast with fraternity brothers....head off to coaching with Anna...my first studio was also her first studio in the US and she comes back every couple of months so I try, whenever possible, to take advantage of that....come home and make dinner (which was quite good thankyouverymuch) then give dh a back rub, as his inactive self is not quite handling several rounds of golf particularly well....he crashes early...I don't make it much past 10
SATURDAY--At PARAGON OPEN, Andrei Gavriline's competition.
Slept until 8:20!!! Yes!!! (Sleeping past 8 is a rare pleasure.)
11--Hair and make-up. I had it done by Boyko & Co. for the first time and they did a REALLY nice job! It made me feel all sexy and latin!
1ish--In ballroom, getting ready, arranging dvd, etc.
2--Compete in Silver 1, Silver 2, and Open Silver latin single dances (though in open I just do cha-cha, samba, rumba, jive--do not have a paso routine yet). Get 1sts in everything! This is not a huge comp--most of my closed single dances were 4 competitors (including me), and I think my open might have just been 3--but I am pleased to have done well. [Of course I made some mistakes and I expect to have them pointed out to me in detail in my lesson, but overall I was reasonably pleased with how I danced.]
Closed B Silver Latin Scholarship--1st! (Out of 4.)
One of Nik's students also wins the Closed C Silver Scholarship, and another wins the Open C Standard (and comes in 3rd in Open C Latin Challenge and 4th in the Open C Scholarship).
Changed around 5ish.
Called the Hubs to tell him my news and get an update on theirs.
7:30-1:30--Evening session including some great am competition: Pasha Stepanchuk and Anastasia Danilova going up against Tal Livshitz and Vlada Semenova. (There were others in the field, including Ron Garber and Liza Lakovitskya, but it was clearly a two-couple contest for the title.) Very fun.
The show was very good too and included several numbers I had never seen.
Still had to shower and do make-up removal, so didn't get to bed until almost 2:30 AM.
9-1:30--Drive home, with a stop for Subway and to raid a Radio Shack of its last remaining C and D batteries.
Return to home far messier than I would have liked.
4-7--PUMPKIN CARVING AND PIZZA PARTY w/my first-year seminar students. Very fun!
I had been worried that somehow my request for an ASL interpreter had fallen through the cracks (I had submitted a request on Tuesday), but we got one, thank goodness.
Child is very jazzed up and I think the students find her pretty entertaining.
We get the news during the party that there will be no school on Monday due to Hurricane Sandy, and we got the students back to campus when the rain has just started to fall lightly.
Btw, if I disappear for a few days, it probably means the power is down and that I didn't manage to relocate. I would say there is about a 90% chance my house will lose power. We do have reservations at a Best Western in town which is closer to my work and a Safeway, so we may de-camp there for the lovely running water, heat, and light...but we shall see. The dog poses a bit of a problem: the Best Western allows pets, but we worry he will be barky in the unfamiliar environment.
Please take care! Don't drive through any water if you don't know for sure how deep it is.
True. I have a GF whose brand new BMW was destroyed when her husband drove it into what looked like a puddle in a run-of-the-mill summer thunderstorm in Orlando. Her car was trashed, but she counted herself lucky. During that same storm, there was flash flooding in which some guy almost died when an overflowing stream washed him away.
A lot of the time, it's the flooding you have to watch.
We didn't! That's why we moved to the Best Western at 3:30 in the afternoon. We actually probably would be okay staying in our own home, but not knowing how bad things will get or how long the power might be out, we decided to do this as a precautionary measure.
We lost power for about a week after Hurricane Irene in August 2011, and then 5 or 6 days after the Del Recho in June 2012. A day or two without running water and air conditioning and/or heat is no big deal, and we're used to that living where we do, but a week is a bummer.
Prepped for Wednesday telephone interview, not knowing how Hurricane might impact Tuesday
Chatted with mom and brother, finalizing plans for x'mas and new year's holiday in San Fran. The warmth! The warmth!
West Coast Swing class from 8-9:30pm
Watched a little something on hulu
Read a bit Michael Phelp's book, "No LImits"
AM--Showered, did laundry, packed.
3:30--Child and I de-camped to Best Western. Husband decided to stay behind with the pets. I thought this was questionable as a decision, but as it turned out, it was fine. It turns out the BW doesn't have a generator either, BUT A) they are on the highway, and therefore not surrounded by tall trees, and B) they are on city water, rather than a well...so even in the event of a power outage, they have running water. Not hot running water, of course, but you can flush the toilet without having to refill the back.
Child and I unpacked, watched tv coverage of the storm, then ate while watching.
After dinner, I graded for 1 hour while she read.
We then read together.
BFF phoned from Queens. Still had power!
Power stayed on both at the Best Western and at CasaChaCha.
TUESDAY (since it is pretty much over):
Breakfast. Checked in with friends on FB.
Watched tv and surfed the net to get all the Hurricane Sandy news. My heart is breaking for the Jersey shore and for NYC. So many homes destroyed...and the economic devastation will really affect both towns. The Seaside Heights Boardwalk! Ocean Beach, Lavallette! Point Pleasant! LBI! The Weather Channel is broadcasting right next to The White Sands Hotel, where we went for summer vacation for three years, including the year I was pregnant with Child. The reporter said it will probably be condemned, the damage is so extensive. My cousin posts a chopper video of Ocean Beach 3, where my parents have sometimes rented a house. Not looking good. Later that day, Chris Christie says that the Seaside Heights log flume is in the ocean. I rode an earlier version of that ride as a child, and rode it with Child the summer before last. I know the boardwalk will be rebuilt, but it still feels like the end of an era.
Read a little.
Checked in with Husband.
Packed and moved back home. We lost one tall but fairly thin tree, but luckily it did not hit the house (or anything else of note).
Looked at many devastating photos and read articles about Sandy.
Graded a little. Complained about one of our printers. Husband switched me to the other one. Seriously, printers are the weakest link of the computing era.
Printed out my marks from Paragon and the essays I was trying to grade.
Graded some more.
Put Child to bed.
Yeah. The boardwalk will be rebuilt, but it will never be the same. It reminds me of the aftermath of hurricane Hugo, which devastated the Carolinas 20? 25? years ago. The first time I drove through after Hugo, I wanted to weep. The pine forests were destroyed. 30 foot pine trees were snapped like match sticks. All the South of the Border advertisement signs that I'd seen hundreds of times on road trips as a child were gone. Blown away or shredded.
Now, however many years later, the pine trees are all back (who knew that pine trees get so big so fast?) But the South of the Border signs are much fewer and much further between. Not to mention that they are IMHO cheap knockoffs of the signs that were built (I'm guessing) in the 50s, when the interstate was new.
Storms like this can change things forever. *sigh*
monday; teach step...small class due to fall break...pack and go to indy....really awesome day of lessons....wait for a call from my brother that never came, over a frozen margarita which was an error on the restuarant's part, and I should have sent back b/c they give me brain freeze....consequently am up with sore feet til 1...and sleep poorly...consequently, slightly less awesome lessons on tuesday, but he has appropriate amounts of tolerance as it is clear that I am trying, just truly pathetic....drive home and put bengay on, have a glass of wine and teach a spin class...home to order a pizza...leave me alone, I am hungry...find dh annoying which would be true of nearly anyone nearly any tuesday evening....go to bed at 830 and sleep til 730 am
9am woke up
9-10am breakfast and getting going
10am - 3pm preapred, completed and submitted an application, plus had lunch
3pm to 4pm CSA veggies blog post - This week on Sunrimei or Ravishing Beauty-In-The-Heart Chinese Radish
5:30pm-7pm, got ready for night, plus had a light dinner
8-10pm Swing Dance at Rexer's in Endicott, NY
10-11pm Drove back from Endicott to the Oasis Dance club in IThaca NY
11pm to 12:30am danced and connected with friends
12:30-12:40am drove home
12:40am-2:10am , showered, prepped for phone interview on wed, ate a little, chatted with mom, wished aunt happy birthday, and when mom brought to my attention it was past 2:00 convo ended and I dived into bed.
Will squish in a few days while I have web access, which is rare until power comes back:
Sunday: worry about hurricane
Monday: wait for roof of house to blow off; I have never, ever encountered wind like this, and I hope I never do again
Yesterday: walk a lot, observing devastation; I live on the river, at a 4-mile wide stretch of open water, and the wind had a lot of fun playing with mere mortals and their creations; one riverside home had its dock lifted up off its supports and rammed through the home itself; once the waters receded, the town's DPW had to use bucket loaders to remove boats from the Main Street, you get the picture; local utility guys tell me it will be somewhere between 3 days and a month before I have power; TDNWMH but it seems petty to complain about no power when others have no homes
Separate names with a comma.