yesterday's activities

Discussion in 'Dancers Anonymous' started by fascination, May 10, 2009.

  1. 3wishes

    3wishes Well-Known Member

    Lots of yesterdays into blur.
    Announce to DH, heading to "dad's" for the week, DH stunned.
    Head up the "hill" and it's blasting freakin cold in Victorville with a wind chill factor. SCREAM.
    Get dad up and around with his new cadillac of walkers.
    Groceries stocked into fridge "what are you doing he askes, we can buy food already made".
    Response,,,,"nope, I love to cook and you can have no salt, HA!:
    he resigns.
    Work with Physical Therapy as he regains strength in legs.
    Hear what happened.
    Neighbor informs me also of what happened.
    Take dad to multiple doctor apppointments,
    Have "The Discussion" about moving...he accepts this much easier than I anticipated, although his home is
    great for all the devices, much better than mine...he still should not be alone.
    Order in-home services.
    Contact the VA for the Aid and Dependence pension.
    Watch him like a hawk as he informs me how to cook, bills, postal service, ahhhhh the brain thinks "there he is...mister pain in my neck...almost normal things start taking place after day three"
    Day four, dear brother pops in on deadhead flight and totally surprises dad....This is good.
    We all leave, he's much much better and stronger.
    Still going to find a place for him closer to my home.
    Spend evening at my house discussin plans with dear brother - regarding parent and move.
    Take brother to airport at OH DARK THIRTY so he can catch a jump seat back to texas.
    Deep deep sleep...so needed.
     
  2. Sagitta

    Sagitta Well-Known Member

    Thursday
    Up at 6am
    Out of the door at 6:30am
    Work from 7:30am to 3:15pm
    Bank and then home early first time this. Chill for a while, cook red lentils with onions and spices. Stationary bike, and dinner of rice and lentils and steamed broccoli. Toffee for dessert. In bed by 10pm. Earliest all week!
     
  3. ChaChaMama

    ChaChaMama Well-Known Member

    @Peaches--Bravo for asserting yourself and saying what you need to be the best worker you can be.

    +++
    FRIDAY:
    Dusting of snow when I woke up...but then it started to snow in earnest at 7:30 and apparently road conditions deteriorated rapidly. The local public schools had planned for an on-time start. Accidents were happening all over the place, including one involving a school bus and a snow plow (no one was hurt). So the buses round-tripped the kids home! Much local consternation on FB about this.
    -->Child's Montessori school had a scheduled in-service day, so we weren't in the mix.

    I have ~1.5 miles of back roads before I hit a major road on my drive to work, and I saw 9 cars which had slid off the road. And this is a newspaper photo of the last little bit of that drive just as it joins the major road. As you can see, a bus slid off the road earlier that morning:
    http://www.carrollcountytimes.com/n...11e2-ab37-0019bb2963f4.html#user-comment-area

    Luckily, I arrived at work intact and in time to make it to my class. Better still, it stopped snowing by around 8:30, so I didn't have to clean snow off my car at work before driving home.

    9:10--ENG 1101. Discussed titles, opening sentences, thesis statements, the importance of using evidence, and the reasons why one should not pad essays with irrelevant info.

    10:20--GREAT WORKS. "King Lear."

    Quick lunch.

    College was sponsoring another flu clinic...and I hadn't gotten a shot yet, so I did it. (They recommend it for employees of colleges, much like they do at hospitals. Because you ARE going to come into contact with it. Hopefully it's not too late for me, as someone I was in a meeting with on Monday is now down for the count.)

    12-1--Provost Candidate #3.

    Debrief with a colleague.

    Home for 5 mins, change clothes, back out.

    2:30--Spray tan.

    Did a little touch-up work on my dress for the comp and a little practice/review just to make sure my mind is in the game. My open paso routine is still quite new.

    That night: "Raiders of the Lost Ark" for Family Fun Night on our new HDTV. (We still are awaiting our Ikea sofa and Pottery Barn Teen beanbag, and we have yet to even order a Palliser home theater chair, so we made a snuggle spot on the floor with blankets, pillows, etc.)

    Oh! And I am so relieved. I do have an appt with Boyko for today pre-comp. Hooray! I was afraid he had forgotten me. I can do my own hair and make-up in a pinch, but it's much better if someone else does it. I think I'd say especially with the make-up: I cannot do the fake eyelashes by myself. That's just not a skill set that I have.
     
  4. 3wishes

    3wishes Well-Known Member

    Head out to circuit training with free weights.
    Trainer gives me a warm big hug and "I'm so sorry for what your going through with your dad".
    ahhhh, he's sweet.
    Then trainer proceeds to work the crap out of my arms and abs with sets of 50 reps each. GOOD LORD!
    I leave, thanking him - it really took my mind off of everything.
    Home - make lunch - and realize my arms? don't even want to lift an orange right now. lol. ouchies....
    Lunch with DH and he begins asking me about near future road trips...my brain is just not engaged at all.
    poor him.
    DD sends me pic of her girls trying on shoes at Kohl's and it's actually pretty funny. snicker.
    Head out to dance lesson, Pro askes about skiing with me when friends arrive in March...hmmmmmm..
    Pro makes my brain twist into petzel with new patterns for Silver Smooth. ARRGHHHH VW is killing me right now.
    Head out to Best Buy with DH after lessons, purchase new flat screen TV (I'm overjoyed as this will create some walking space in our small living room) and a Dell laptop - after looking at everything, I'm not paying that much money for a Mac right now.
    Laugh at DH - he's so excited about the purchases, and I'm thinkin' "yeah but I'm the one how has to figure it all out" lol.
    Head to Red Robin's for dinner.
    Homeward after - I collapse on sofa - what a week! brain disengages from everything and it's to bed earlier than normal.
    Even DH is shocked. I ponder, as I walk down the hallway, hmmmm, how many calories does frantic brainwork burn up?
    on that note, dive into my pillow, pull blanket up over me...and slow down!
     
  5. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member

    It's been a week since I checked in, so I probably should. Overall, it was a very cerebral week, which I suppose is good. Or maybe not.

    Me: Stuck with the new exercise and eating plan. Have lost 12 pounds so far -- enough that there's a visible difference in the way things fit. If I weren't a slacker I would probably find my clothes that are a size smaller. But I am a slacker. Besides. I enjoy the reinforcement that comes from wearing baggy clothes.

    Lots and lots of internal/mental/spiritual work. I took the day off from work ... Monday? and spent a lot of time thinking, plus doing some of The Work of Byron Katie, something I used to have serious resistance to because of someone I know who seems to think Katie is the Messiah. I don't think Katie is the Messiah. I think she's a very wise woman who deserves to be listened to. That's all. But, right now, that is enough.

    When I went to work the next day, two female coworkers caught my attention because they were giggling. When I stopped what I was doing and caught their eyes, they admitted that they were talking about me, speculating about how I'd spent my weekend. *wink wink, nod nod* I wasn't sure how to react to this. Should I feel glad that my nascent spiritual inquiry shows on my face? Should I be offended that these two clearly assumed my "happiness" had to do with sex? (Seriously, girls. This isn't college anymore. Sex isn't always pure joy and, even if that were the cause of my lightness of spirit, I sure as hell wouldn't let it show on my face.) Should I feel offended that they would pry, however conspiratorially, into my personal life? Myeh. So I decided to assume the best and let them enjoy their girlish silliness. The world needs more girlish silliness.

    Rest of the week: incremental progress toward Wild Freaking Huge Blue Sky Goals. Haven't felt this good in years.


    DS: Cashier at Target happens to be in DS's biology and photojournalism classes. And she recognizes DS, and introduces herself to me, very politely. I can't resist pointing out to DS that 1) she is cute and 2) she has a job. Hmm. I also decide that I will get in her line, whenever she and I are both at Target at the same time. It's never too early to start working the grandchildren angle, especially when your kid is as clueless as mine. lol.

    Work: The *giant* company I work for has implemented a new performance evaluation system that involves actual goal setting. So I set some stretch goals, discussed them with my well-meaning, clueless manager... then realize that my goals (from his perspective, probably) were more suited to his performance plan than mine. I had already started researching some stuff and gotten results on things that *I know* are on his goals list for the year. Deal with it, dude. I am a powerful, experienced woman. With a vision bigger than the end of my nose. A leader. And you, dear, are a manager and twenty years my junior. Are you really arrogant enough to think there's nothing I can teach you? And, while we're at it, your undervaluing someone's contribution is about you and your lack of appreciation, not about the person or the value of their contribution. (This is not about me, but about a black-balled coworker.) It's going to be an interesting year.

    DS's father is in town this weekend. He planned the trip just so he could see DS. DS decides that he'll go out to dinner with his father on Friday, but come home after dinner. At this pronouncement, I have to push back. "Yeah. You're ambivalent about your Dad, but that's no excuse for narcissism. This man rearranged his life and spent hundreds of dollars to come see you for a weekend, and you're going to give him two hours at Mooyah Burger on Friday night? No. No. Just no. If you didn't want to see him, you had business to tell him a month ago not to buy the plane ticket. Done. You're going to stay with your Dad." It is so hard to navigate these waters. I respect DS's right to choose what kind of relationship he has with his father, but, at the end of the day, how DS treats other people is who DS will become. I hold DS accountable, no matter what anybody else does.


    We're going to have an after the Super Bowl chip and dip party on Monday, and I have to almost physically restrain myself, to prevent me from doing the usual Party Perfection dance. Jarred dip CANNOT possibly equal P's Addictive Onion Dip and j_alex's Artichoke Napalm. But it's not my party. Besides the last GF in my posse will be leaving soon, so another party right now is probably overkill. I have to send her off in style within the next couple weeks. I just hope I make it through today without going to Target and buying cream cheese and mayo. Just sayin.

    Other stuff I forgot. :)
     
  6. j_alexandra

    j_alexandra Well-Known Member

    Days without lesssons throw me totally off kilter. This week: no lessons, other than Monday, so, the week has been fading away into the memory abyss.

    I remember spending part of Thursday trying out comp makeup

    I do remember going to NY on Friday to the fabric district with DB#1, which was enormous fun. Oh, also had a consult with Lenore the Goddess of Hair to do something with my kep for upcoming competition -- I have short hair, there's no point in paying Boyko rates for something so simple, but I just can't do it myself, and I'm going to someone I trust
     
  7. j_alexandra

    j_alexandra Well-Known Member

    Yesterday:

    Take bus to NYC for a blues dance immersion workshop from 1-7; when I signed up, I figured it would be a huge stretch for me, b/c I've been blues dancing exactly once before, but wotthe, I can always leave and chalk it up to experience; workshop is on smoothing out your blues dancing, I figure hey, Smooth! ;-) am agreeably surprised to find out that all those guys can lead, every single one of them, even the less experienced among them; workshop is *enormous* fun and very useful; hoped for fun, but did not expect useful, a win-win
    Walk about 25 blocks to meet father at theater (by my count, after walking from bus station @ 9th/42nd to dance @ 7th/22nd, then from 7th/22nd to theater south of Washington Square, I've been Active today, shall we say; good compensation for a week with no lessons after a weekend with the flu; feels good to move)
    Manage to stay awake through fairly boring, not-good-enough theater
    Drive home in light snow; father's car is 4WD Volvo, large and heavy, happy happy joy joy, b/c people drive *stupid* in the snow and the car handles it beautifully
    <insertwhine> I hate hate hate driving in the snow in the dark, thought those days were behind me when I got off the road<endwhine>
     
  8. ChaChaMama

    ChaChaMama Well-Known Member

    @pygmalion--I had to look up Byron Katie, since I think you've mentioned her twice and this is not a name that was on my radar before at all. (I wonder if I will now have that "tilapia" experience @peaches talks about.) Glad to hear the internal/spiritual work is bringing you joy.

    @pygmalion, again--Goal setting is an interesting thing. I've got a question for you about how it works in your corporate world, as compared to in academia. In academia, if you are setting goals for sabbatical, it is important to put down a goal that you are pretty sure you can accomplish. You don't want to make it such a wimpy goal that it seems like you could accomplish it in 1 day, but you don't want it to be so lofty that there is a decent chance you will fail, e.g., "I will write an entire book from scratch and get it published by either Oxford University Press or Routledge" = probably not a great idea. Similarly, just from a psychological viewpoint, I try to set realistic goals--ones I will have to strive to meet, but that are not impossible. Now, I definitely do have a few colleagues who set overly wimpy goals at work...but I think there's a happy middle ground between setting a goal of "I will scale Mt. Everest!" and "I will climb on that desk and consider it a day."
    I wonder if your manager tends to be a super conservative/wimpy goal setter for fear of failure and looking bad in the eyes of higher ups, and you tend to be more ambitious, while still realistic? Just a thought.

    @j_alex--Yay for all this pre-comp preparation! When/where? PM me if you don't feel like putting it in the public forum.
     
  9. j_alexandra

    j_alexandra Well-Known Member

    New York Dance Festival. At the Roosevelt Hotel, which has a ballroom so beautiful it's a pleasure just to be there. End of February.
     
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  10. ChaChaMama

    ChaChaMama Well-Known Member

    Speaking of comp preparation...

    SATURDAY:
    Slept until almost 8.
    Got ready.

    10:15--Leave for comp.

    11:40--Boyko appt for hair, make-up.

    12:40ish--Hit ballroom and watch my teachers other two students at this comp dancing standard. (Of the three of us, I'm the only one who doesn't 10 dance. Actually, I'm the only one who doesn't 14 dance, as they both compete smooth with Mazen Hamza, who comes down at least one day a week and teaches at Atlantic Ballroom.)

    1:30--Get dressed. Start to warm up by self, since Nik is still doing standard.
    Practice floor is tiny and very crowded. It is one of those temporary floors with metal seams.
    I stumbled on one of the metal seams...not a big stumble, and I doubt anyone else even noticed, but in my awkward recovery, the heel of my right shoe bashed my left big toe nail.

    Damage report: about a 1/4 inch crack down middle of big toe nail...and I'm bleeding! Fabulous.
    Get paper towel and convince blood that it needs to clot now. Clean up the toe as best I can.
    Practice a little, then Husband and Child arrive.
    Paint nails with Child, who helps me with my "handy hand." (That's what Child calls the dominant hand.)

    Run routines w/Nik.

    5 closed single dances.
    --Another student's turn.--
    5 open single dances. My first time doing my open paso! I got through it! (I actually made a small mistake toward the end of my closed paso, probably b/c I haven't been practicing that!)
    --Quite a few heats off while other students go.--
    Closed B silver scholarship.
    --Other people's turns.--
    Open B scholarship.
    RESULTS: 1st in closed scholarship, and a 3rd (out of 5) in the open scholarship! I was proud of that 3rd. The 1st place couple--the guy was the am--was AMAZING and definitely out of my league--for now! I haven't seen marks, but I'll bet they were 1st by a mile. They are what I aspire to look like...maybe someday, if I keep working at it!

    Got changed.
    Husband is hungry and wants to eat.
    Child isn't much enamored of offerings at hotel restaurant, so we head out.
    It is snowing, again. We are having quite a week of weather here in MD--various forms of precipitation 4 out of 7 days!
    I-Phone to find locally owned pizza place...but it turns out to be basically a carry out place. Head back to a Chili's we saw next to the comp.

    Food was good, service kind of slow. Thank goodness the children's menu had a "See how many words you can make out of the words 'TALENT SHOW' thing. This kept our family reasonably distracted...but I really wish we had ordered an appetizer.

    Husband not doing so great after the meal (coughing a lot)...and unfortunately we both have to drive home since I arrived early to get hair/makeup and watch friends. I offered to let him leave the car in Baltimore and we could go get it the next day, but he said he thought he could do it. Child had been planning to ride with me, but I floated the idea that she could "babysit" Dad and she said yes, that was what she wanted to do. Good girl. He also said he would call my cell if he decided he needed to stop.

    Ugh. Had to stop for gas on the way home, in the snow and cold. (Go ahead and laugh, fascination and NUDRMS. I know I am a winter weather wimp.)

    Everyone makes it home okay.
    Put Child to bed, later than should have.
    Look at Husband's photos.
    Work on make-up removal and hair style deconstruction. Shower.

    Bed.
     
  11. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    fri...teach bike and bench...lunch...head to job 2; engaged clients who also ask if I can teach them for free how to dance a few steps at their wedding :)....home to cook for family who are in town for a visit...nice to re-connect with them... brother-in-law is at a rough point in his career (and at a bad age to be looking for work)...it is rare for him to be vulnerable...was nice to be able to be supportive....we did "spud fest" (baked potato bar) and steaks....it was a lovely evening.....

    sat; up at 5:30 for the cursed staff meeting at the gym which is worse than usual because boss has stepped down...am not certain that the administrator who is navigating the transition is a "trade up" or a "trade down"....does have that young arrogance going...meh...I am blessed that this job is non-essential so might as well stay on the ride a bit longer and make whatever impact I can...home to a nap, with a bad dream, got up on the wrong side of the bed and stayed on the wrong side of the bed the rest of the day...was ms cranky pants w/cabin fever all day long....poor dh...got some practice in ....but not enough...
     
  12. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    congrats ccm
     
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  13. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member


    Thanks for asking. I think there are at least two factors, here. One is that, historically, goal setting wasn't done by most people in this organization. People at the top of the organization would tell you what your goals should be. Then you'd write them down as a formality. The new process is supposed to be more collaborative, so there are bound to be some negotiations, while people figure out how the process is going to work for them.

    The other issue is that this manager is relatively young and relatively new. His only managerial experience before this was in a factory setting which had a much more authoritarian culture. He's not used to people who think for themselves. My background, OTOH, is in a culture where I'd get a year and a half time frame, a budget and the barest outline of a project and be expected to pull it together. Completely opposite approaches.

    In any case, I've decided to stay put until DS graduates high school, while I work on a couple of my goals -- some personal, some professional. So this manager and I are going to have to figure it out. :)
     
  14. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member


    Oh my goodness! I am so sorry that your DH is not 100% yet. What is this? Day 110 or something like that? Yes. I realize that driving to and from a comp, taking photos, etc, is a vast improvement, but still. I don't even know your DH and I am ready for him to be well.

    I can only imagine how you, your DH and ccc feel. *sigh*
     
  15. ChaChaMama

    ChaChaMama Well-Known Member

    Thanks for asking/caring. I'm sure a lot of my friends must think that I'm crazy and/or lying when I say my husband is still sick. In fairness, I would probably think it was impossible if I didn't live with him.

    Yesterday was Day 104. The ear/nose/throat guy's take is that the problem stems from a deviated septum and that his mucus-y junk does not exit his body but instead drains back down into his chest. This coupled with the asthma is keeping him sick. I think the deal is that he is adding an antihistimine to the mix of meds my husband takes and then we're going to "Wait and see" for 3 months before deciding on whether surgery is merited. Both my husband and I would be willing for the surgery to happen now. Not that anyone ever exactly wants surgery, but this cannot go on forever.

    My husband feels that being out of the house for 8 hours is too much for him...even if it is largely sitting at a dance competition. Thank goodness he works from home so he can rest if he has to. What if he had a 1 hour commute and an 8 hour out of the house workday? He couldn't do it. He does work a lot of hours, but at least he can set his work pattern.

    I would like to see him get a thorough work-up from an allergist/immunologist. He says the specialist he saw does that stuff too, but I would like to see him go to someone who specializes in that field.
     
  16. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    I'd like to see him to that as well, particularly give his history as a premie....I was a premie, not as badly as my brother, but a premie nonetheless, and have lost a premie....my brother, when he catches nearly anything, has it forever, and has a great deal of difficulty shaking it it....and I am confident that he has underlying issues that need to be addressed by someone who can appreciate his medical history
     
  17. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member

    @ccm I am sorry that your family is going through this. When I'm going through life's stuff, I always tell myself that it's like swimming in the middle of a lake. Even though I can't see it right now, as long as I keep swimming forward, I will eventually reach the shore. I doubt that's helpful right now but I do want you to know that I'm channeling positive thoughts your way. I think in some ways it's harder, in situations like this, to be the support person than the sick person. *hugs*


    re: Party Perfection. I've decided to cave. What can I say? This is the Pygmalion Party Place, where all the crock pots are full and all the children are above average. :D I'm going to make the Artichoke Napalm, which is ridiculously delish and was a huge hit last time.** I'll also make a Southwest Black Bean and Corn dealie, to cover the vegan angle. (It's also easy and cheap, since I already have everything except fresh cilantro.) And queso will round out the day. I can live with that. Not my usual nineteen course fiesta, but it'll do. And anything is better than six month old sour cream dip in a jar. *shudder* :)

    I would make the onion dip, btw, P, but I definitely agree with you. It needs to be made well enough in advance that it can sit in the fridge while the flavors blend. Next time. :)



    **Except for the one annoying lady who kept calling it spinach dip. Seriously. What about artichoke do you not understand? lol
     
  18. ChaChaMama

    ChaChaMama Well-Known Member

    @Pygmalion--I would like to say that due to your good/bad influence, I am actually contemplating buying a second crockpot! In my case, it wouldn't be for entertaining so much as cooking ahead and freezing meals.
     
  19. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member

    Go for the triple buffet server. Target has a Crock Pot brand one that's usually $50, unless you happen to catch it on sale. It is awesome. I often use it for making dinner for me and DS, because it has separate controls for each crock. You can make one, two, or three things at a time. Very nice, if you want to make a main course and a side dish for dinner.


    As an added bonus, I think it would be perfect for those end of semester parties you like to throw. ;) :D
     
  20. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member

    Bummer. I checked. Target still has the triple crock pot server, but now it's sold only online. I bought mine in the store during the holiday season. Still $49.99. Maybe it will be back in the run up to Passover/Easter. These things tend to be in store around holiday seasons.

    Two thumbs up. :)
     

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