Dancers Anonymous > yesterday's activities

Discussion in 'Dancers Anonymous' started by fascination, May 10, 2009.

  1. Peaches

    Peaches Well-Known Member

    Fasc, your posts about the grandson made me think of this: saw brother and SIL and niece briefly tonight. Kind of cool that niece now has very definite facial expressions, even moreso than just a couple weeks ago. The progression is one if fascinating.
  2. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member

    They change very, very quickly when they're little. It's beautiful. :)
  3. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    was truly one of the best weeks of my life...I am keeping a journal, because I know he will not remember it...but I do know that I am 2100 miles away and he is still doing the hand motions for itsy bitsy spider and going to the front window....which both warms and breaks my heart at the same time...but we gave him lots of one on one attention and he thrived...and it was sublime for more personal ways than I can recount...and also fabulous to be away from tv and internet and to simply live like a child ...wonderful
    Purr and pygmalion like this.
  4. j_alexandra

    j_alexandra Well-Known Member

    I'm on a cooking and baking kick, dunno why
    Theater in the afternoon; better than many, and I got onstreet parking, color me happy
    Home, eat corned beef and cabbage and inaugurate the new 1.75l bottle of Jameson
  5. j_alexandra

    j_alexandra Well-Known Member

    Go to Ballet; only one other person shows, so she, the teacher, and I go for coffee and talk instead of having class; was great fun and I had a chance to say some stuff to the teacher I've wanted to get off my mind
    Home, more cooking
    Pack box to ship something I am sending to a friend, a chance to use a life skill I never wanted but at which I am massively accomplished, go me
    Lesson, in which magic happens; whazzup with *that* but believe me, I'm not complaining
    Ex has asked politely if I will take him to supermarket; I agreed, largely b/c I'm going to supermarket so what's the big deal; this turns into a classic Ex moment, in which what I thought was one thing he thought was another but did not bother to tell me so and I am out of the habit of asking; by the time he's milked it for all it's worth, I've spent almost 4 hours dealing with him and his BS and I am reminded yet again of why I am no longer married to him, a lesson I needed to remember, or better yet, Just Say No <headwall headwall headwall>
    Get heat list for Saturday; turns out I have all my dancing in one time frame, not divided between morning and night, yay
    Pay bill, sigh
    Heavy icy wet snow begins to fall; I manage to get home before it's dark, but holy cow, it's slushing! Getting up driveway is challenging, and I am the last family member to manage it; both nephews' cars get stuck
    More cooking
  6. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member

    It's easy to fall back int old patterns of interaction, however painful or dysfunctional they may have been. Whatever buttons they pushed while you were married, they will continue to push after divorce, if the button pushing continues to work.


    I found it helpful to cut off all communication with the ex for a while, while I figured out what and where the buttons were. Doesn't stop him from pushing, now that we're taking again. It stops me from knee jerk reacting.
    j_alexandra likes this.
  7. ChaChaMama

    ChaChaMama Well-Known Member

    @Fascination--I'm SO, SO GLAD you got to enjoy some quality time with The Cutest One! And I think that even though he may not remember it, the bond and the trust starts at that young age. My child has always had a special relationship with my Mom, and I think the fact that she and my Mom have slept in the same bed when we get together since she was about 1 year old has really been special for the two of them. She just loves her Nana and trusts her and thinks she is the greatest.
  8. ChaChaMama

    ChaChaMama Well-Known Member

    I'm way behind, but some of my days have been pretty dull, so catching up on those won't take long!

    8:20--Drop off.
    9:10--ENG 1101. Lesson on audience: the importance of thinking about who your audience is, what the needs of that audience are, what assumptions you can make.

    I talk to the class about defining words. Students love to write things like "Dictionary dot com defines 'charity' as...." I hate that. I would argue that there is no need to define words that are in common usage...unless you are going to argue against the dictionary and radically redefine the word. (This pretty much never happens in ENG 1101.) I did, however, say that there are times where you can define a word, if it is a word your audience probably would not know. I said "For example, I see YOLO written on Facebook and I have no idea what that means." "You Only Live Once!" one of my students told me. I could have looked it up on Urban Dictionary, but it gave him such joy to tell me. And it illustrated my point: if you know I'm your audience, you can probably assume that contemporary internet lingo might be outside my sphere of expertise.

    10:20--GREAT WORKS II. Anna Karenina. Two kids got into an animated argument about Anna and Karenin's behavior after she survives her deathbed, with the female student a lot more understanding of Anna's point of view that her husband is oppressing her by repeatedly and insistently suggesting she shouldn't even say goodbye to Vronsky, while the male student felt that given her adultery, she has to expect this. Loved that they were so energized about it.


    2--Meeting with the Dean of Faculty and Associate Dean of Students about the review of the first year program.

    3--Drove to Towson.

    4:30--Double Nik lesson.

    Home, dinner.
    Family Fun Night: Finished watching "Her Majesty's Secret Service." Not the best Bond movie, this.
  9. ChaChaMama

    ChaChaMama Well-Known Member

    Grocery store in the AM.

    Read some The Last Apprentice: Attack of the Fiend.

    1-7--At children's dance competition: jazz, tap, hip-hop, lyrical, musical theater, ballet, etc. Child has several friends on the team and may join the performance team next year, so trying to get the lay of the land and a solid sense of pluses and minuses.

    Saw some things that I like and some I do not. In fact, one thing bothered me quite a bit, and it was not the cost of the entries or the costumes. (Please. I do ballroom. I'm inured.) Need to do some thinking.

    Read quite a lot of The Last Apprentice: Attack of the Fiend.

    Graded 6 ENG 1101 essays.

    6.1 miles on treadmill in 1 hour. Go me. I'm making my (post-fainting incident) comeback!
    j_alexandra likes this.
  10. ChaChaMama

    ChaChaMama Well-Known Member

    8:20--Dropped off Child.

    9-3ish--Graded, graded, graded.

    3:30ish--Took a break and read with Child.


    5:30-8--Graded, felt sorry for self. Some of these re-write papers are such a waste of time. If I generously give you a chance to re-write your sub-par paper, don't just fix a few sentences. Ugh!

    The only good piece of news is that I am working in my new downstairs office, which I love...and the cats love too. They are very affectionate and keep me company. :)

    Get all midterm grades submitted. Yay. Good to have that out of the way.
  11. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member

    I dunno. I've had some pretty animated arguments with folks about words that I *thought* were in common usage. One word that comes to mind is sympathy. I had a rather vigorous conversation with someone (a well educated someone) who believed that the only accepted use of the word was condolences. When I used sympathy to mean simple fellow-feeling, he and I got stuck. Nobody died; why use the word sympathy?

    People can be funny about words -- especially people who don't read a lot. This is not to say that students should write the definitions of commonly used words in their papers. I did that once in Freshman English, only because I'd hit a writer's block and was trying to dig myself out. Didn't work. :)

    OTOH, I'm guessing that you know what charity means. ;)
    ChaChaMama likes this.
  12. ChaChaMama

    ChaChaMama Well-Known Member

    Make list of all the things I would like to get done over break. It's a somewhat daunting list!

    AM--Put away two huge loads of laundry.

    12--Double Nik lesson.

    3--Pick up Child from school.

    5-8:30--Child at dance. I write in diary, in which I am way behind. I also talk with another dance mom about the competition and the one thing I saw that I did not like. Also told her her oldest kid is really good!

    Home, more food.

    Put Child to bed.

    Hot bath! Bed.
  13. ChaChaMama

    ChaChaMama Well-Known Member

    This is exactly the phenomenon I'm trying to work against: the tendency to define a really common word in order to fill space because my students are worried about having to write 3-4 page essays. Many of them seem to have graduated high school with the impression that length is one of the most important features of an essay. Maybe in their experience, that has been true.

    It's not true in my class, though. I have repeatedly emphasized that I'm really fine with a 2 1/2 page essay if you've said all you had to say. I am very anti-padding. I am also fine with a student writing 7 pages if they are 7 substantive pages...but if you ramble for 7 pages on the grounds that maybe I'll be impressed by the length, I'm going to be exasperated.

    I just want substantive, well-supported arguments. If you are going to argue the SAT is an unfair test and a poor way of evaluating students for college admission, show me statistical evidence. Quote experts in admissions offices who say they don't find it that useful. Etc. Don't quote me the dictionary definition of "fair."

    Now, the best paper in the batch made an interesting distinction between what is JUST and what is FAIR. The student did NOT quote a dictionary to make his point, but used his own words and a fantastic example. That's good writing!
  14. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    thanks small as it sounds, the fact that I taught him that song and the hand motions and that he is still doing it it huge to me, having had to miss so very much...I have done well at accepting that and not focusing on it but it doesn't mean that the sadness and longing isn't the fun we had together and the connection we had this week was affirming and consoling for me and I also deeply believe that it was consoling and warm and safe for him...there are simply no words...and, almost as wonderful; I think his mom saw that too and was welcoming of it....
  15. ChaChaMama

    ChaChaMama Well-Known Member

    I don't think it's small at all. :)

    And I'm just going to add that although I know that the conventional wisdom is that kids don't actively "remember" stuff that happens when they are 1, I think trust bonds built at that age still register on a level that is more primordial than memory.

    Also, early memories of special people do tend to stick. I'm 45 and I sometimes forget to pick up a can of tomatoes at the grocery store even when it was on the dang list...yet I vividly remember that my Papa (Mom's dad) used to lick his finger before he turned the page when he was reading to me. Such a little thing, but it stuck with me and that gesture reminds me of him to this day. He died when I was 5, so this is clearly an early memory. I spent a lot of time with my grandparents when I was young.
    j_alexandra likes this.
  16. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    thanks...that is my hope...currently the little guy lives so far away, but we did get to spend from 8:15 to 5:45 with him for those 6 days...and I am pretty sure he got the kind of undivided attention for a length of time that is pretty rare ...and my hope is that his mom will actually move closer...which is what she has expressed the meantime, taking the car in for a tune up so that I can go back out in the summer :)
  17. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

  18. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    yesterday; sleep in...clean car, love pets, unpack, do laundry, go to a group class
  19. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member

    Thank you SO MUCH for sharing. Is it possible? He's even more adorable than the last time! :)
  20. Peaches

    Peaches Well-Known Member

    Hi, Pygmalion! I've only got my phone to post from, so I'm not going to go into detail here and now, but I'm in training this week with a fantastic instructor so I've been thinking about you all week. Have your ears been burning? ;-)

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