Discussion in 'Dancers Anonymous' started by fascination, May 10, 2009.
You and DH are in my prayers.
mon..teach two classes, drive to indy...should have had more food...latin went well, standard did not...fatigue and stress over impending comp doesn't bode well and overdue conversation should have happened but didn't...I beg off a bit early for only the third or fourth time in 5 years...pour margarita on it with son who is interning in town...drive to new hotel where there aren't bed bugs, but hit a curb and blow my tire...fabulous..
tues...son puts on my spare, get wires crossed with pro over previous night's events and, long story short, I miss my tues. lessons....not good...drive home upset, teach spin and it is humid...counsel couples in the evening...home to wine wishing the day, and the one before it, had never happened
wed...teach two classes, have a meeting, work on volunteer bathroom rehab...teach two more classes...home exhausted...bed soon
Gotta love "those" kind of days Fas...makes us appreciate the boring ones!
Call, throughout the day, "I'm coming home, they are discharging me, papers in hand, can you come to hospital?"
Ok, this happens a few times yesterday. Finally an R.N. says, late afternoon,
"Mr. ........... would you please return to the bed, the medication we are giving you, for home, that we've been monitoring, is not working and your heart rate is high again."....I can see his disappointment but I'd rather find out in the room than at home.
Late last night,,,,bring DH home,
DH stands outside our home on front lawn, taking it all in. Every bit of our dead end street.
And he's grateful he still can.
As am i.
Small talk, medications talk, doctor talk...late night "healthy" snack.....he takes a really long shower.
Late night TV...he never does this.
And fast asleep, up for a while, and back asleep....I note at 3 a.m......he's breathing better than he has in a year.
Thank You Lord.
for the past week, I've been in a fog of concentrating on learning a lot of stuff, some physical, some not, most of which has nothing to do with dancing, but, of course, affects the dancing; so...highlights:
Theater three times, most of which is pretty dull but one was good
Lessons change direction, I feel like I'm a beginner again, and I say that in a good way; many, many very deep satisfactions from these lessons, and Teach seems pleased
Gyro and rolfing sessions are magnificent, and I hope this physical change in me will last, it's extremely rewarding, extremely, did I say extremely?
Dinner with a buddy, in which we not only set the world to rights but get in a little unexpected flirting with men who decide we're flirtworthy; nice to discover that my mad flirting skilz have not totally rusted
I have so much on my mind that I actually *vacuum*; this is an infallible indicator of major mental upheaval
Go to Allentown, PA, where there's a gun show at which my friend Liz is set up; we go to brekkie at a diner and Catch Up-- diners in PA are hit or miss, I've had some memorably bad meals in diners in PA, sometimes including twist-ties, plastic bags, and the Incredible Inedible Flapjack, but that's another story-- Catching Up takes so long, we leave the diner and I actually voluntarily enter the portals of the Allentown gun show so we can continue talking, something I thought would never, ever happen again; meh, life is change, and it turned out: I was not bothered at all, color me pleased with myself
Home; pick up Blond German Friend, pick up father, go to NY to theater; come home, dinner at local restaurant
Airport run to pick up buddy from out of town who will be visiting for a week while she takes a class in NYC; she and I have been friends for decades, but seldom see each other, so this is majorleage catch-up time, for both of us
Have a small but unpleasant incident with a pit bull who decides that I am not his friend; TDNWMH, shall we say; no serious damage, except to my peace of mind, which is taking some hits this week anyway; I discover how much I was upset by this when I go to...
Lesson, in which I utterly fall apart until Teach gets me to spill the problem and things improve
Get an email from someone searching for an amateur partner; discuss it with Teach, who offers some startling advice
Nice start to the day, warm sunny morning, girls early to school so time for a few laps around the park before 8:30 Conditioning for Dancers. Feel like I'm making progress there lately, especially with aerial silks. Even dude-who-won't-just-shut-up didn't bother me much.
Email from coach wanting to chat about setting up a more cohesive training plan. Things have been feeling rather haphazard, have been frustrated about it for a while not getting answers I've been looking for, so this is encouraging.
Take DS to algebra tutoring, he finally "gets" something he's been having trouble with, and even managed to bring up a crappy test score. Time well spent. I'm so over homeschooling, grateful we've found what looks like a good fit for him for next year.
Text with dance friend about coach's email. He wants to set up a dinner date, but our schedules don't mesh for weeks. Wish he'd come back to the studio.
Girls are in uncooperative bickering moods after school, drag their brother into it. Not fun. Have to pick up another kid from school on our way to the studio, unreasonably feel like they're all being S L O W on purpose. Slide in about a minute before the kids' class starts. They're being very loud; I feel bad for the people taking privates.
Communicate with Standard pro I'm going to be starting with soon. Looking forward to that. He said "I'm excited!" which cracks me up.
Chat with coach is not as productive as I had hoped. Nothing concrete to say, just that I'm not doing everything I should be and my dancing is my responsibility. Well geez, I'm doing everything I'm given, so whose fault is that when I ask and don't get answers? She's going to plan out some specific things for us to work on, and we'll talk about it soon. Feels like a bunch of sunshine and hand-waving. I need to know what I have to DO, and it's totally unfair to criticize the things I don't know if you won't ever get around to teaching them.
Do my best to turn my stinky attitude around. Home, dinner (DH even made it in time to eat with us, yay!), wrestle kiddos through remaining homework and piano practice and off to bed. Deep breath, play the piano for a bit (Chopin Nocturnes, bliss!), practice while DH drives to the hangar to pick up a piece of aviation electronics I need to ship somewhere for him in the morning. House is a disaster, but I'm past caring.
Mess around online, see email from a guy on the studio board following up from our meeting on Tues. He (again!) brings up his idea of guaranteed time frames for people to get through bronze, which puts me right back in my stinky mood. If his time frames are reasonable (which they're not) I'm owed a gigantic refund.
There may have been ice cream. Darn.
thurs...teach, work on rehab bathroom project at gym, nap, tan, practice a psalm I have to sing at cathedral on sunday, begin to organize some training materials for the new part of my job, feed animals, do laundry...pretty much sit and try to figure out my dance life....lessons tomorrow ...so I am hoping for a better day...bed soon
Lesson, in which things are a bit tough, then improve
Deal with X
Shopping, movie, cooking, general fun
To NY for another session at Yamuna's studio; this one taught by an extremely strong man with serious ADD problems, which actually suits me just fine, b/c as I ask questions, he answers, and we range all over the place, rather than being slavishly stuck to a syllabus
Meet out-of-town friend, drive home; I may have finally figured out how to drive in NYC in rush-hour traffic and not go out of my mind, and the hybrid car is *magnificent* at times like this; I think I used a teaspoon of fuel or something like that, hybrids love slow driving
Home; friend does some business (she's a realtor, can work some parts of her job from anywhere, have smartphone will travel)
Home, both of us crash into bed and sleep the sleep of the just
Up to Victorville, take step dad to Apple Valley for Wrist Release surgery, silent prayer that this works!
DH, on board figuring out his new routine at home. When to take meds, what to ax in terms of foods, learning to read ingredient labels and limitations on sodium, etc etc etc.
DH promised me he would not do too much. hmmmm, he better NOT, as I head up the hill thinking about this.
Surgery goes well, step dad relatively pleased, it's been a long day in yet another waiting room.
Take him home, settle him in, head down the hill to the other male in my life.
House is picked up/cleaned up....my brain explodes...I know how he is...he never just does a little bit.
We chat, DH smiles, assures me that each time he got up to walk he simply made the walk worthwhile and did not overly exert himself at all. ok, I'll buy that this time mister.
DH laughs more now, smiles more than ever, hugs more, and called into our business informing the employees not to call the house at all unless there is a fire burning down the warehouse. He will call them - in 30 days. BRAVO! oh my!
DH sits outside in front yard, as I spy on him,,,,neighbors mosy over,,,sit with him....chat....I see hugs being exchanged...
this is good. really good.
Attended the Warrior Games this week (event for US and Great Britain warriors who were injured or ill.) Yesterday watched a guy who had lost both legs at the upper thigh and had lost one arm at the shoulder swim the 100 meter freestyle event. 100 meters. With one arm. I must remember this whenever I start to complain that something is too hard.
fri...teach bike and bench...drive to indy...lessons...drive home....pretty much it...though much was to be learned on a variety of fronts...it was a rich day in it's dynamics
I don't think I've posted on this thread in 3 weeks. I will summarize those yesterdays:
Monday, April 27-Thursday, May 16--Graded a lot of stuff.
(Also taught classes and went to meetings.)
Okay, a few other things happened:
Saturday, May 4th--Bought a new car! We got a 2013 Prius. It replaces a 2000 Ford Taurus with almost 200,000 miles on it.
Sunday, May 12th--Saw Annie on Broadway for Mother's Day.
Tuesday, May 14th--La Petite ChaCha's end of the year concert.
Read Eve Ensler's _In The Body of the World_. Recommended.
Yesterday was my first day of freedom!
Spent some time in the AM on clutter reduction. I washed a bunch of tablecloths that had accumulated on top of the washer-dryer: the Christmas cloth, the Valentine's Day cloth, etc. There was other junk below it, and I found to my shame a bag which had maps of Hershey Park in it...from 2010! So I think it would be fair to say that I need to do this more often!
6.3 miles on treadmill, walked it out until 7 miles, then sprinted an extra .25 mile.
Took Child to dentist.
That evening: Girls' Night Out! "Star Trek: Into Darkness" with Child and one of her besties. Her friend lives even more out in the country than we do, and there is no darkness like country dark on a twisty, unfamiliar roads, esp when you are tired. But we made it home in one piece.
THERE you are CCMM...good to see you! again.
Yesterday, DH wakes up - uh oh...it's going to be a "get through it" day...he's pretty weak and frustrated. deal with it.
Decide not to leave house, except for market later in day,,,,going to keep a keen eye on this guy.
Converse with DH,,,,he's winded when simple chat...is a few sentences,,,radar up in my brain...hereeeee we go again!
Rest for dh, all day.
DH brother comes over, hangs out for a good while..."thank you, whew."....they love each other in that I'm the older brother, you can't be sick, way.
Calls, text msgs,,,,,DH decides every single person he knows is PI___ed at him as they've told him for a long time...this was going to happen...and how could he do this to them...ect. ect....it's working...by George....the tongue lashings are working as well as reminding him how much he's loved.
Oregon daughter calls in evening, talks to her dad, did I mention how loud the girls are? I hear this hospital staff member tell her dad "it's not your fault, there's nothing you could have done, it's been lingering...just get well, stay healthy and move on"....this brings relieve to DH for some reason.
DS calls....why can I hear these kids on the phone with DH all the way into the kitchen...we are not hard of hearing.
GD#1 has read through several books purchased at Powell Book Store already and has begun her drawing book with artwork.
Looking forward to another trip to Portland soon. ahhhhh love it....
I attempt to make sliders,,,,and they are fabulous I must say,,,,also note, first time DH has been truly engaged with a meal and liked it.
Scroll through on-demand movies,,,we cancel plans to see "42" and watch "The Hobbit" instead at home. This was a good choice. DH remembers reading the book in high school, then Lord of the Rings. We find several movies we missed in the theaters....hopefully, we will have time to catch up.
kitchen renovation starts Monday, spending Saturday and Sunday creating new kitchen temp space in living room.
Finish wallpaper removal.
Take down Kitchen "nails, screws, holders, anything on walls". Haul boxes inside.
Watch DH as he helps me...warning him...about energy usage.
Empty all cabinets, set up temp kitchen.
Text msg from all the kids...PLEASE DO NOT REMOVE THE BREAKFAST BOOTH....PLEASSSEEEEEEE. hmmmmm.
DH is quite chatty, moving around the house, feeling good.
NASCAR, 2million dollar all star race. I lie, tell him I want to watch it, so he sits and rests for awhile.
Finish finding places to put things, boxes, tables, chairs, counting down to Monday morning,,,,YES!
Take a stroll with DH outside the house.
Neighbors all visit,,,,,the guys continue to rass DH.
Dinner! Quiet night as we view the masses of ingredients, dishes, stuff, appliances that is no longer hidden, gotta laugh, and the kids don't even live here anymore~! HA!
Saturday was a day that left me feeling kind of blue and frustrated about some things.
1) I hate schedule conflicts and I just realized that two out of the next three fun things I planned to do have pretty big schedule conflict problems. The biggest problem is my husband's 25th reunion, which I had really been looking forward to. Child's school camping trip was originally slated for May 23rd-24th. At some point, that was moved to May 30th-31st. I have been so wrapped up in work that I'm sure Husband and/or I just signed the permission slip without even absorbing this fact. In the meantime, Husband and I made plans to go to his reunion from May 30th-June 2nd. UGH! So now we need to figure out what to do. The camping trip was a true highlight of her school career for Child last year. (It's an upper elementary school thing, so last year was her first time.) It's a great opportunity, but I don't know how the school manages to put things at such horrible times for me. So...my guess is that Child and I will probably fly up very late on Friday or early on Saturday. Ugh.
2) I also am missing a couple things that I thought I knew where they were. I couldn't find the extras of my daughter's 4th grade class photo. I can find extras of 1st, 2nd, 3rd, and 5th. Where are the extras of 4th, my favorite school photo of her ever? We do have some copies and I have it scanned, but I'm bummed.
As for actually what I did:
10--Summer swim team sign-up.
12-1--Naomi's gymnastics. I read Reyn's What Happened to Anna K in the parking lot.
Responded to an e-mail from a student displeased about the grade she got on her research paper and wanting to know more about why she got that grade. I word process my final comment on her paper, so I went back and checked. I already wrote a 713 word comment on that paper! There is NO question in my mind that every single teacher in my department would have given this paper a grade close to what I gave it. The other thing that makes this annoying is that this student still managed to get the highest grade in the course overall on the strength of her other marks. Is it really THAT hard to take a little constructive criticism, even when your final grade didn't suffer? Yeesh!
I was expecting a possible &^#storm from the students I gave a C-, a D+, and an F to, but this girl got a mark that should put her on the Dean's List. I don't get it.
Got ready for Child's audition for the dance company's performance team. This included running through the routine a bunch of times, figuring out how to get the music onto a portable device, getting her dressed and ready.
5:15--Dance PT audition. Is it a good decision to try out, a bad decision? Should we have done it a couple years earlier? Or should we not do it at all? Child got some corrections from the teacher she auditioned in front of, and the teacher made it clear that she will be stricter with her about technique going forward now that she knows that she is interested in the team. I hope this winds up being a positive experience.
Stopped to pick up veggie fried rice for Child and shopped at Staples for the retreat I am planning.
ccm...I have a child like the student you mentioned....and I still don't understand it....though I am told I am the same way about my dancing so I reckon I ought to try to figure it out ...my sympathies
And sorry I somehow quoted my whole post above. I seem to have forgotten some of the nuances of how the DF interface works during that 3 week hiatus, because I was trying to edit my post above and add a little more info to the story, not repost it a second time.
It actually felt really good to get that out. Maybe now I can put the incident behind me!
Separate names with a comma.