Ballroom Dance > Your Dance Teacher

Discussion in 'Ballroom Dance' started by Dancebug, Mar 13, 2006.

  1. Dancebug

    Dancebug Well-Known Member

    Having heard a recent gossip about the top professional standard couple who almost broke up due to a partner’s misbehavior, I wonder about this. Do you have respect for your coach(es) as a person? I mean, I bet all of your coaches and teachers are wonderful dancers. But are they respectable humans? Is there anything else except dancing that you learn from them? Is there anything else that you find wonderful about them? Or does it not matter to you as long as they can teach you to be a better dancer?

    I have had five private teachers so far, and I found all of them wonderful except one. The one teacher was my fist private teacher, and I stopped taking lessons with him long before I found out his problems. If I had known his problems, I would not like to keep taking lessons with him, though, I think. But the other teachers are not only wonderful dancers/teachers, but I also find there are other things to learn from them and I have very high regard for them. I think even if I had not met them through dancing, I would be very happy to have them as my friends.
  2. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    my pro readily admits that there was a time when he wasnt a very swell fellow...I find him to be and exceptional person with a deep spirituality, diverse interests and sharp intellect, an excellent teacher- articulate ,patient and compassionate but with very high standards, and an awesome dancer....our most frequent coach is also a top notch fabulous woman who in spite of many personal trials always gives us her best...
  3. mamboqueen

    mamboqueen Well-Known Member

    I would just as soon as not know any of my teacher's personal business. And unless he was a complete jerk to me, I can't see liking him any less than I do!
  4. alemana

    alemana New Member

    i made a voodoo doll version of my teacher and every night i stab it over and over until i fall asleep.

    hi, that's a joke.
  5. waltzgirl

    waltzgirl Active Member

    I do respect my teacher as a person. I don't think I could take lessons on an ongoing basis from someone I didn't like and respect. One of the things I respect about him is his professionalism. We don't talk much about personal things at all, but over the years you can't help observing how someone lives his life and I've certainly grown in respect as I've seen him make various choices. He's quite a few years younger than I am, so I don't feel like he's a mentor to me in anything but dance. But he is a very astute psychologist and has an excellent grasp of the interpersonal aspects of teaching dance, which I really appreciate.
  6. wyllo

    wyllo New Member

    I expect my dance teachers to behave professionally in lessons and I want to be able to have a friendly relationship with them. That doesn't mean we have to be best buddies or even interact outside of the studio. What they do on their own time is their own business, but I suspect that if he/she had a behavior problem that I would find offensive, it would probably be apparent during lessons.
  7. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    yes...I appreciate that a teacher with a keen intellect outside of the studio has a capacity to bring analogies into the lesson that are useful from his/ her own full life...which I think also plays into that instructors ability to be healthy and balanced in the studio, like the rest of us...if my pro shares, it is usually toward some dance analogy but b/c I see him so often, I end up learning alot both personally and as a student...and I respect what I've learned
  8. hello

    hello New Member

    I wonder if a person's morals and ethics are somehow subtlely ingrained in their dancing style? An aggressive dancer is aggressive in other areas of his/her life? A gentle dancer is gentle toward others? Is one's personality reflected in dance? Or is dance a mask, a vessel to express opposite or contrasting attributes? A shy person comes out of their shell through dance, or a snake hides behind a demure dance style?

    My group instructor is a beautiful dancer and beautiful person on the inside. I think her dancing reflects her pure heart.
  9. Sagitta

    Sagitta Well-Known Member

    True..very true...I've discovered, myself.
  10. RIdancer82

    RIdancer82 New Member

    If I can't get myself to have at least a certain level of respect for an instructor, I wouldn't call him/her a coach. I would leave it as a teacher. To me, the title of coach refers to sooo much more than just someone who teaches technique and steps, etc. A coach helps you to dress and look appropriate at comps/performances. They help you learn how to carry and present yourself as a dancer. They help you to overcome obstacles in your dancing and sometimes in your personal life (depending on the situation). Overall, they help you to find yourself and to understand how to present that through your dancing.

    Would I want someone that I have no respect for doing all that??? absolutely not.
  11. motardmom

    motardmom New Member

    It's been a while since I had a lesson, actually. But speaking about the past instructors I've had...

    I generally gravitated towards instructors I respected (or had no reason not to respect). The instructor I learned the most from, however... we had some conflict periodically. When things off of the floor were going smoothy, the instruction went smoothly. But when things off the floor were conflicted, I shut down and stopped lessons until he pulled himself together. I think the longest I went like that... hmmm... I think I missed 4 consecutive lessons with him once. (It wasn't very long, I was having twice-a-week lessons then.)

    Generally speaking (in dance or in life) I have difficulty embracing people I do not respect for whatever reason. It's a personality flaw, I need to love them despite their faults. One day I will overcome this flaw. In situations like dance instruction, I - like MQ - would prefer to not know what goes on with my instructor that doesn't pertain to me or the lesson. When it affects me or the lesson, it can develop into a real problem.
  12. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    I think so...personally, I dont want to be a good dancer badly enough to pay a morally reprehesible instructor...and I spend so many hours a week withy mine that I am sure I couldnt do it if I didn't like him as a person and that many hours a week I'm gonna get to know even the most professional to a degree
  13. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    rushing off to fabric store;) :car:
  14. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    nah, MM I dont think its a flaw...its a sign of can will yourself to love someone all day long but theres no harm in not feeling like being in their arms when you are displeased with for personal pro doesnt do alot of it...but I guess the amt doesnt matter to me so much as the reason...if its toward a dance analogy great...if its before the lesson, fine...but I think that varies from student/instructor to student/ instructor depending upon many many factors...
  15. SPratt74

    SPratt74 New Member

    I feel the same way! I don't know, but I can't bring myself to love someone that I don't respect, and I can't bring myself to show respect for them if I don't love or care for them any! I think the older that you get, you realize that you don't need people in your life that are going to treat you like crap. I think that is ok too, and you shouldn't have to feel as though you need to apologize for your feelings, because they are your feelings, and no one can control how you feel or expect you to feel differently just cause they don't agree with you by chance! ;)
  16. cornutt

    cornutt Well-Known Member

    I have total respect for my instructor as a teacher and as a person. I'm not the easiest person in the world to teach something like dance to, because I tend to want to think about it in physics/mechanics terms. She has to be able to decipher my language sometimes, in order to lead me down the correct path. She has a great feel for how to work with guys like me; she really put me at ease when I first walked in the studio as a raw beginner. She's a brilliant dancer, very dedicated to keeping up her own training and constantly improving her own dancing. She's a wonderful follow, and she can do a pretty decent job of leading too. (She can lead a heck of a lot better than I can follow, that's for sure! ;) ) And she's scrupulously fair

    Plus, she's been a good friend. She came to visit me when I was in the hospital last year. We cut up and swap jokes. She and her DH go out to dinner with us now and then. We do things together. She's one of the most likeable people I've ever met; you can't help but like her. I know that some people desire to keep things "strictly professional" between them and their instructor. With some other instructor I might do that too, but with her I wouldn't have it any other way.
  17. hello

    hello New Member

    It sounds from the comments that respect for a teacher is necessary to have a positive teacher/student relationship. But I do find that there are many amazingly talented dancers that I do not necessarily respect as well. I think there are dancers out there who are both very talented but mean, or inconsiderate. That's why this topic came up. Then the choice becomes whether or not to patronize this person or studio. It is a tough call. I hope that there are enough genuinely good teachers who are genuinely good people so that the good dancers but not so good people do not have to be the only choice.
  18. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    I guess there is a distinction for me...I dont mind a teacher who is edgey sometimes or a visiting coach who is tough or arrogant...but I am not giving my money to someone who is habitually mean or immoral or rude...I just wont reward matter where I live or how desperate I am...but I also dont need a bunch of smoke get in blown up dress, either....but if I am going to spend 8 hours a week in someones very near proximity, which IS my case...I gotta like an respect them, maybe not daily, but certainly over the long haul
  19. Mattd

    Mattd New Member

    I find that the teachers that I benefit most from are ones that can joke around and have a good time while teaching me.
  20. SDsalsaguy

    SDsalsaguy Administrator Staff Member

    You'd *LOVE* Jean Marc!!! :lol:

    And, of course... welcome to the DF!!! :D

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