Your Pet Peeves

Discussion in 'Tango Argentino' started by AnnaN, Sep 26, 2012.

  1. Mladenac

    Mladenac Active Member

    I may say that I dance with my eyes close part time.
    I look around what's happening and immerse in the embrace, and the music.
    Looking around is like breathing while swimming. :D
  2. AndaBien

    AndaBien Well-Known Member

    I once gave a class exercise for guys to dance with their eyes shut and the followers to keep their eyes open. Leaders were supposed to think about being more aware of their partners movements. Followers were supposed to be aware of any hazards and resist those movements, thereby becoming a little more assertive in their movements. (We were in a spacious room).

    I'm not sure if anyone gained anything from the exercise. One lady closed her eyes and allowed the couple to dance into a wall.
  3. Zoopsia59

    Zoopsia59 Well-Known Member

    I guess if the leaders were wearing contacts, they could just take one out and that would "soft focus" everything.
  4. NZ_Guy

    NZ_Guy Member

    I don't like that none of the followers in my community seem to decline offers to dance. I'm very reluctant to ask the really good followers to dance for this reason.. If I invite someone to dance I want to know that it's perfectly possible that I'd be declined, not simply because she's tired, or her feet are sore, but because she feels that a dance with me would be uncomfortable for whatever reason. And of course actions speak more credibly than words - so I would like to see leaders who I know are uncomfortable (based on what I see, and what followers have repeatedly told me) being declined. That way, if I'm declined just as much, I'll at least know that I'm no better than them, whereas right now, I just have to guess and hope that my self-perception isn't wildly mis-calibrated.
  5. Xenophon

    Xenophon New Member

    NZ_Guy, if you want to be declined or not, come dance in Wellington ;-)

  6. NZ_Guy

    NZ_Guy Member

    Bought a ticket the other day.. will be there early Feb. And of course again in June..
  7. dchester

    dchester Moderator Staff Member

    I guess I don't understand why you'd ask someone to dance with the hope that you might be turned down.

    [​IMG]

    If you are looking for feedback on how you are doing, wouldn't a practica be a good place to solicit feedback?
  8. NZ_Guy

    NZ_Guy Member

    I suppose I just like the idea of a tanda where both partners want to dance with the other. As opposed to one who does, and another who is merely tolerating (or suffering through) it because she prefers that, to declining the invitation.
  9. rain_dog

    rain_dog Member

    I think he wants to dance with women who turn down other men, indicating they really want to dance with him. He doesn't personally want to get turned down. I.E. choosey women who choose him.
  10. NZ_Guy

    NZ_Guy Member

    Can't argue with that. But I do want to get turned down by anyone who doesn't want to dance with me. I really don't want to provide an uncomfortable tanda to anyone. For this reason I err on the side of caution and seldom invite anyone I think is exceptionally good - I pre-emptively decline myself as it were.
    Kelena likes this.
  11. bordertangoman

    bordertangoman Well-Known Member

    hMM thats almost as bad as Darwin-Juarez syndrome:

    DARWIN:Juarez?
    I heard over the wire
    that you're interested.


    JUAREZ: I'm not interested.


    D:That's not what you told Blaster.


    J; Don't you get it?
    I want him interested in me.
    And he'll only be interested
    if he thinks I'm not.

    D:But you are interested?

    J:- Of course.
    D:- But not in me.

    J:No, no, no. Because you know
    you could have me
    which makes you not interested,
    and that means I wouldn't be
    interested in you even if I were.
  12. AndaBien

    AndaBien Well-Known Member

    I suppose you have shades of gray between exceptionally and just pretty good, at least I hope you do. I'm wondering, if a good partner turns you down, how long, if ever, before you would ask her again?

    There are really good partners who are happy to dance with lesser dancers, because they want to support the efforts of learners who are working hard to learn this dance. After all, someone supported their efforts when they were beginners.

    If they do accept to dance with you and you are not sure of your dancing, you might ask them for feedback after the tanda is over.
  13. Zoopsia59

    Zoopsia59 Well-Known Member

    You mean no one has ever turned you down?

    If you've ever been turned down, then it seems your problem has already been solved.

    I second the idea that if you are concerned that followers are just suffering through it, ask them for feedback. If nothing else, your willingness to accept feedback will make them WANT to dance with you, so that will also solve the "problem".
  14. dchester

    dchester Moderator Staff Member

    If a women is sweet enough to dance with me, even though she doesn't think I'm really good enough, I'm up to the challenge of trying to give her a really good dance, and possibly changing her mind about me.

    I've certainly had a few tandas where in the beginning, the woman seemed to be more in "protect mode" or something, but half way through the first song, it was like she decided, "I guess he can dance", and then relaxed, changed the embrace and tried to give me a good dance as well.

    It doesn't always work this way, but if she's nice enough to take a chance on me, I'm going to make the best out of it.
    sixela likes this.
  15. bordertangoman

    bordertangoman Well-Known Member

    there's a song about that isnt there? ;)

    I'v had the same experience..from "oh dear I wonder what's going to happen" to "this is quite pleasant."
  16. Mladenac

    Mladenac Active Member

    I would add breast implants and chewing gum.

    Breast implants makes me feel like dancing with a barbie. :eek:
  17. Mr 4 styles

    Mr 4 styles Well-Known Member

    you say this like its a bad thing...;)
    dchester likes this.
  18. Mladenac

    Mladenac Active Member

    I like to feel boobies but not baloons. :D
  19. Kelena

    Kelena New Member

    Very brave!
  20. Spitfire

    Spitfire Well-Known Member

    I don't know how common this is in other areas, and maybe I mentioned this earlier somewhere, but one studio here will cut songs off about halfway thru making it only half a dance. Find this quite annoying. While I don't do AT this is at the Friday ballroom dance.

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