What are the 5 top reasons that make a man ask a woman to dance? Beauty comes first?

tangobro

Active Member
#83
... In my opinion, it is not the mastery in dancing that comes as the first reason when a man invites a woman to dance. Rather than that, beauty/or a very short mini-skirt is the key point...
For me, mastery is not the 1st reason, but beauty/or a very short mini-skirt are not even near the list.

1- I've danced with her before & feel we are compatible for the tanda being played.
2- I've seen her dance with other leaders who have a style I admire & I think we may be compatible.
3 - She seems available at the moment & responds to eye contact.
4 - She does not meet point 1 or 2, but the music is too nice to pass up a chance to dance, she seems willing & approachable, and meets point 3.
5 - We are friendly because we know each other from workshops or practicas and she meets point 3.
 

bastet

Active Member
#85
For me, mastery is not the 1st reason, but beauty/or a very short mini-skirt are not even near the list.

1- I've danced with her before & feel we are compatible for the tanda being played.
2- I've seen her dance with other leaders who have a style I admire & I think we may be compatible.
3 - She seems available at the moment & responds to eye contact.
4 - She does not meet point 1 or 2, but the music is too nice to pass up a chance to dance, she seems willing & approachable, and meets point 3.
5 - We are friendly because we know each other from workshops or practicas and she meets point 3.
I'm curious, just for my own edification and application for festival situations and so forth...

from what you imply in 4 and 5, you'd choose dancing with someone you don't know at all who is willing and approachable over someone you know from a class or workshop who is also friendly or approachable? That was how I read it.
 

dchester

Moderator
Staff member
#86
I'm curious, just for my own edification and application for festival situations and so forth...

from what you imply in 4 and 5, you'd choose dancing with someone you don't know at all who is willing and approachable over someone you know from a class or workshop who is also friendly or approachable? That was how I read it.
To me, it meant that when it's a song you really like, you're not going to spend too much time looking for the "right" person, but just go for the first person who looks willing.
 

bastet

Active Member
#87
To me, it meant that when it's a song you really like, you're not going to spend too much time looking for the "right" person, but just go for the first person who looks willing.

Ah yes- that's another way to view it I hadn't looked at it. I had just wondered if people tended to be offput by people they meet at workshops or something...Instinct would probably serve pretty well there, since if they look willing they probably like the song too. :)
 

tangobro

Active Member
#89
...from what you imply in 4 and 5, you'd choose dancing with someone you don't know at all who is willing and approachable over someone you know from a class or workshop who is also friendly or approachable? That was how I read it.
Yes. In certain circumstances, as little hobo said, I'm looking for yes. As dchester pointed out - I'm not looking for Ms. Right, I'm looking for Ms. right now.

When an irresistible piece of music starts, unless I've pre positioned myself to be near enough to a preferred partner to get the dance before another guy does, I'll dance with the woman that seems willing and approachable. Some of the women who started in this category are now on my #1 list.

Now, as for women I've danced with in practicas & workshops, I might dance or not dance with them depending on my experience with them at the workshop. If I saw them at the workshop but did not have an experience with them I might dance with them @ the milonga, but I'll check them out via points 2 & 3. The difference is I will be actively checking them out with the hope that we might click.

Note to OP - all above applies to AT only. In other venues I may give slightly more consideration to looks.
 
#90
I think what Paula said does hold true some of the time but, I have also found out that some very decent souls were hesitant to ask me (early Thirties, relatively young where I dance) because "you're young enough to be my daughter". Aw....
 
#91
As a male I find very interesting that many men want to dance with beatiful females. Its strange because i think dancing with a beautiful girl is not an orgasmic activity so there is no speacial benefit dancing with good looking women.
 
#92
As a male I find very interesting that many men want to dance with beatiful females. Its strange because i think dancing with a beautiful girl is not an orgasmic activity so there is no speacial benefit dancing with good looking women.
Yeah, it's certainly not my approach, but when you chuck in the sublimated mating thing, and guys wanting to vicariously look good (ie through her), then it makes sense enough, in many blokes....

Oh well, poetic justice - chances are they're missing out on good dances through their superficiality.
 
#93
As a male I find very interesting that many men want to dance with beatiful females. Its strange because i think dancing with a beautiful girl is not an orgasmic activity so there is no speacial benefit dancing with good looking women.
Presumably you never look at beautiful women either? I mean, looking is not an orgasmic activity, so there is no special benefit looking at good looking women.
 
#98
i am offended by the thought that some of you gits deliberately don't ask women who are too attractive/young some of us spend a lot of time and money to maintain the charade.
 

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