yesterday's activities


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nerf war inside house,
pillow fight, grandparents vs grandchildren.
legoslegos and more legos
it is a good day

Ditto on the nerf war, except Mother against Son. I declare myself the winner. I've still got my Nerf skillz! :D

Also try to remember how to play mancala and get my heinie whipped at Uno. I guess I have to concede and let the boy win something, sometime. ;)


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ccm...we actually have a decent sized hispanic population around here...(particularly where I choose to eat :))....I took 4 years of Spanish and have not retained it well and have always regretted it, because I love the culture....I could see myself, when my dancing days are over, or reduced, doing ministry in the Hispanic community, either nearby or far flash cards and watching more telemundo for me

I have a dear GF, a chaplain, who lived in Mexico for ... two? three years? on a church mission. She said it was one of the most rewarding times of her life. She does okay with Spanish, but is better at listening than she is at speaking it.


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Too tired/stressed/lazy to check in.

Will say that I'm very proud of myself because I did take breaks and lunch today and managed to get in an entire hour of walking, just like I'd planned. :)

Will check in later, after I have a chance to decompress a bit.


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@Pygmalion--Go you with the hour of walking! :) You sound like you have a new plan which I wager is going to have big payoffs in terms of getting your bp where you want it. Cheers to a healthy you in 2013! :)


8:20--Took Child to school and she literally skipped from the car to the school building. That is one cheerful, school-loving kid.

Read some of The Swerve: How the World Became Modern.

Talked with Nik on the phone and decided to have my lesson today instead of tomorrow.

Provided some helpful advice to a student via e-mail on his senior research project, which I will be supervising this spring. I'm trying to convince him he needs to walk before he can run, and I get the bad feeling he is convinced that he should start by sprinting and hurdling. (Metaphorically speaking. This is a literary research project we are talking about, not literally running.)

Drive to Office Depot. Get flash drive for Nik. They have all these cutesy ones, and I get him one that looks like a monkey. Put his jive from the Christmas party onto it. (It got pulled from FB due to a copyright challenge--I'm assuming of the song--but I do want him to have a copy.)

Drive to Towson.

Double Nik lesson. The theme of the day was faster, sharper hip actions.

Picked up Child at school.

Home to confusing "follow up" e-mail, which made me realize that I had missed the first e-mail. (Turns out initial e-mail had been sent at 9:40 PM on Tuesday.)
It looks like my name will be put forward for Director of the First Year Seminar program. :)
I am instructed to consult with a couple people about the challenges facing the program. I am consulting...but I think I will take it! (Don't worry: I will still teach. I get a choice of one course release or extra $. So that means I might teach 5 courses/yr instead of 6 courses/yr.)

Read with Child.

Another round of family consultation on basement project. (We're having two rooms put in down there: a study for me and a rec room.) We picked a wall color: Sherwin-Williams Undercool Blue.
Other plans: pink sofa, zebra throw pillows. One wall with some kind of book-themed mural or overlapping book covers or quotes from favorite books.

Took Child to dance.
Watched some. Child has absolutely beautiful posture at the barre. Not the most flexible kid and not the best turn-out, but her carriage is gorgeous.
Also chatted some and read in the car some.

Home. Put Child to bed.

Read some more of The Swerve. I was oddly tired by 9:45 PM, even though I slept until 7:30 this morning...but made myself push on until 10:30 PM so I could meet my reading goal for the day.


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wed; teach interval, drive to Evanston and pick up dtr, take her to lunch, talk with dh and son, nap, plan class, back to gym to teach an abs class and another interval class....going to be teaching alot this month for which I am grateful in terms of weight control and making a bit of with dtr ....bed around 11


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Did some reading and some work e-mail in the morning.

PM--Went in to work.
Principle order of business: getting book order forms in! (Already very overdue.)
Asked friends on FB what Shakespeare they read in high school and got a HUGE volume of responses in very short time. <3 my friends. I have not previously included Shakespeare in GWII, but have now decided to do so, and in my graduate humanities class as well. We will do "King Lear."

Went to the bookstore. Ran into a senior colleague-friend, someone I used to be quite close to although our friendship has kind of faded over the years.
HIM: Are you just gong to stand there hovering all day?
ME, coyly: No. I'm waiting for you to leave so that you don't see me handing in my book order forms late and then wag a finger of disapproval.
Lol. He said he has no moral ground to stand on because he's often quite late too.


Treadmill workout. Decided to do a little speed work: jogged at 6 mph for 10 mins, then 6.8 mph for 1 minute. Repeat. Repeat. Then took it easier in the second half of my workout, with intervals of walking and jogging at 6 mph. 6 miles total. Shower.

Dinner. Read to Child.

Read The Swerve.



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Up early at DD house.
Laundry, haul it downstairs, did I mention how much I dislike 2 story houses?
There's a reason I have a ranch style stairs!
DH gets up, time to pack what we can while laundry is on the never ending last 7 minutes,,what is up with that!
Kid-lets, sneak downstairs and they think we cannot see them as they spy on Grandpa eating Frosted Flakes.
Grandpa decides to scare Kid-let's (yep, that's it DH,scare the living day lights out of them!), and chases them up the stairs.
DH gets the wise idea, as a Grandpa, to make the kid-lets take the Tony The Tiger OATH loyal to Frosted Flakes before allowing them to have any.
I have to hide in laundry room because I'm dying with laughter as all these kids pledge to Tony The Tiger.
DD - announces that darn sliding door on mini van is staying open, alarms are going off, battery is draining, etc.
ok, new plan, DH will leave later in the day - let's get van to chevy dealer - and take care of all scheduled appts for her while we are here.
Chevy dealer loans DD a brand new, only 13 miles on it, Traverse. She loves it, I love it,,,DH is in trouble now!
Play frisbee with kids, take tiny dog for walk, hide and seek in the house.
Lunch, and finish packing.
Kids are excited to drop me off at airport and see the jets, WAIT, big cousins, my 4 nephews (college to middle school)- start shooting marshmellow guns...and the CHASE IS ON! IT is good fun for the last day.
See one nephew off to Snowmass Co. See another one off to "study for finals camp", see the other two off to airport to pick up friends arriving from Colorado.
kid-lets and DD see me off as well curbside. Airport truly not busy, could be because it's Thursday.
ok, well, now that I'm waving goodbye and DD is pulling out,,,kids are crying. sigh.
DH is hitting the 10 fwy, aiming for Fort Stockton before the snow hits, really? road warrior you.
I note inside airport, these college basketball players are really...truly....TALL. woweeee, an entire team of them.
Flight home, magnificent above the cloud cover which opens up over Phoenix.
Call DH upon landing, DH informs me,,,6 inches of snow,,,and before he did something stupid in his not so snow equipped car, got the last room available in Fort Stockton, doesn't know if he can get on the road in the morning - so no chances taken. THANK GOODNESS!
Home, call DD - yes, I'm home,,,DD says Thank You for everything....and come back for 3 weeks in April....
uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I laugh,,,,and end conversation with "we'll see".....and good luck with your
teaching position, note to self: yep, DD is soooo over the retail business after 3 years of it,, this is a good
move and they really want her. All is right with our little world, for now.
Nighty night.


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for the life of me,all I can remember about yesterday was that I went grocery shopping b/c dtr's bf is coming to stay a few days, cleaning the spare room that son was in over the holidays(b/c he left for Oregon with the room in shambles), making chicken parmesan and meatless pasta salad for dtr and her bf...heading out to a silver samba class at a local studio.....have decided that part of what ails me is a need to change up my dancing which is going to mean 5 occasions of social dancing in the week....was really nice to go back to the place I first learned be able to just enjoy a group bed around 11


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-Dropped Child off at school. Mom of another child at the school got into a car accident at the base of the school's driveway that was serious enough that it looked like the airbag deployed. She was out of the car on her cellphone and seemed to be fine, though obviously shaken up. Her car was smashed and blocking a lane of traffic (and this is a 1-lane in each direction narrow country road). Yikes.
Of course, in typically wanting-to-be-helpful-but-not-actual-being-so way, several other people pulled over and asked her if she needed help, and all cars came to a complete halt: those entering the school, those exiting the school, those who had nothing to do with the school and just need to drive on this road to get to work. Finally people realized they were NOT actually helping and that they could and should go around her. I felt really badly for her. If I were in that situation, I would want 1 or 2 friends with me, but I wouldn't want every parent in the entire school standing around gawking, even if they were clucking sympathetically.

-Wrote an e-mail saying that I given it some thought and am ready to have my name forwarded to the committee for approval (for that Director position). So we'll see what happens!

-Finished reading The Swerve: How the World Became Modern.
Started Deborah Levy's novella Swimming Home.

-Looked around on the internet and think I have found a pink sofa I will like for our new rec room. I want to do a pink sofa and zebra throw cushions, and then maybe a papasan chair or a chair and a half. We are also going to have some kind of wall mural or collage with a book theme. I want this to be a fun, playful room.

-For Family Fun Night, after we ran a couple errands, we saw the documentary "The Captains," about the captains of Star Trek. NOT recommended. There was one part the sociologist in me found kind of interesting about the extreme cost to marriages and family life that starring in a tv show exacts. But on the whole, not so good.


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Good Luck CCMM.....they would be lucky to have you as a director!
Yesterday, clean up from trip, grocery store, dance lesson - I swear he's trying to kill me.
Run into dear friend...catch up.
DH calls, still stuck Fort Stockton....wait it out.
Step Dad calls, grrrrrrouse "I haven't seen you in 30 days"...uhhhh,,,what? you told me not to come up. remember?
Collect all the assisted living facilities information he wanted - he uses no technology, not a problem.
Collect information on the Veterans Home in Barstow, wow, charges 70% of montly income for assisted living.
It's far, but he likes this idea (step dad - army guy that he was), he really likes it as he reminds me
because, while he's for the most part active, if he gets sick-er - he has immediate care and doesn't have to wait.
hmmm, hmmmm, hmmmm,
We'll see where this road leads us.
Run information for vacation next week.
Respond to e-mails, and do alot of DF - catch up.
Watch MERLIN....i remember reading all these books in grade school.
Stock fridge with actual real food,,,,at least for a week.
Watch next door neighbors rip up their driveway with jackhammers to find water leak cause by palm tree roots.
geeezzzzz, now that is loud and louder.
Make room for new threadmill, I'm so excited!
To bed late, that's ok, the house to myself for one day and two nights...ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.


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When's the last time I checked in? A week and a half ago? Two weeks?

Oh well. I'm lost now. I have already established that I do not remember yesterday, much less two weeks ago. A high level overview is going to have to suffice.

Me. Even more self-assessment, including a few Startling and Nasty Realizations. *sigh* What's that cliche? Something about acknowledging a problem being half the battle? I think that's nonsense, of course, but hey. I can deceive myself if I want. Whatever it takes to get one foot in front of the other.

Start new plan of incorporating more physical activity into every day. Big win here. It takes very little effort and I feel heaps better mentally. I expect it to take time before I feel better physically. Mental stuff was instant. There's something about breaking up today's fire-fighting with a brisk 15-minute walk around the beautiful albeit man-made lake that makes everything feel better.

DS on break for what seems like an incredibly long time. On one level, TDidNWMH, since I was out of vacation time, so had to tiptoe around most mornings before schlepping off to work and, to add insult to injury, watch DS peacefully snoring away while I headed out into the fray. Part of me wanted to shake him awake and give him long lists of chores to do in my absence. Another part of me reveled in the fact that, in spite of all the angst of the past few years, my baby still sleeps like a baby. Let the boy sleep. Adult-sized problems and responsibilities will come soon enough. Besides, when I was his age, I also slept like a baby. Let the boy sleep. He doesn't have much chronological childhood left. Let him enjoy it.

DS also got showered with gifts pretty much every day during his break. Because of a snafu or two, his Christmas gifts got delivered late. So he got the usual lunch box treats for the entire month of December, plus gifts on Christmas and every day since, including yesterday. He opened/used his last gift (an Amazon Kindle gift card) yesterday. I have to say this worked out well. Yet again I see the benefits of Hanukkah. Will have to ponder implications for next year. We had much fun playing the games DS pretends he's too old to play. Nerf! Uno. Scrabble (at my insistence.) Mancala, which I'm pretty sure neither one of us remembers because our matches are SO boring. IIRC, if you're good at it, mancala is an awesome strategy game. When scrubs like us play it, not so much. lol.

Also saw The Hobbit with DS. (This is a big deal, because he doesn't like going to the movies. This is a throwback to some excessively scary previews when he was little that have left him with a near phobia.) I have mixed feelings about the Hobbit, but I have to say that the experience was good. DS's obvious enjoyment was the highlight for me. He kept chuckling and cringing and asking me stuff about LOTR. I hope he and I will always have the kind of relationship we do now. As crazy as it sounds, single motherhood has been a very, very good thing for me and, in some ways, DS. I shudder to think who DS might have become if he'd identified with and been raised by his father. Seriously. I don't claim to be the world's best parent. Far from it. But I have a wonderful son. I've always thought that kids are born with enormous potential and all that we, as parents, can do is mess them up or get out of their way and let them soar. I pray every day that I do the latter and not the former.

Work: I have to say that I'll be glad when the summer interns are gone. They're sweet, sweet girls, all of them. But two or three things. One) I wish they would please stop asking me inane questions that they should already know the answers to. Two) I look at these girls (all daughters of high-level execs) and think about all the kids out there who don't have connections. As much as I love these girls, I think there's something fundamentally unfair about their getting guaranteed, great-paying, looks good on a resume summer and winter jobs for four years, if they want, while TONS of kids out there are wondering how to get a toe (not foot, toe) in the door. TDNWMH. And yes. I know that DS has not just his foot, his entire body, in the door at a prestigious science org for the next how ever many years he wants, if he wants, just because of his father's connections. I don't think that's fair, either. Three) One of the interns is an absolute ditz. I mean really. You can see her synapses firing, that's how slowly they fire. Not only has she made more than a few messes for me and others to clean up, she's a liability, if you're trying to get anything done. Constantly with the stupid questions. Not to mention that I'm way too old to have any desire to be interrupted multiple times per day when she gets bored and wants to chat about how she, "Saw the cutest little puppy online," or how she "Listened to a whole country music CD." News flash: I don't care. And this just galls me even more, when it comes to point 2 above. There's no way she'd have this job if it weren't for her powerful Dad. Grr. And yes, I know I sound brutal when I say I don't care. That's not entirely true. I do care about people. I LOVE making conversation and getting to know people. But, when I am in the middle of writing a 32-page marketing document and then condensing it into a brochure, I'm typing a mile a minute, leaning forward, concentrating and talking to myself while I'm trying to figure something out, DO NOT interrupt to tell me about a cute puppy that's not even yours!!!

Postpone trip to PUs because Dad's oncologist appointment was rescheduled.

Other than that, not much to share right now. More to come. :)


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fri...taught bike and clue what else transpired....headed back to old studio for a cha class and about half an hour of the party...wanted to spend time with dtr and bf

sat....breakfast with friends which involved travel and long visiting so really took from 9-2...for third night in a row, head to yet another local studio(FP's new place) to take a wcs class but do not stay for the party as it is dtr;s last night home before I have to take her back to school....spend more time getting to know her bf better as he is undoubtedly going to be my son in law one day...besides, it is still a bit odd go to FP's place...a good deal of water went under that bridge and I can even see the question marks on certain faces when they walk in and see I only do that in small doses once in a while to make sure that it's all good


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@Pygmalion--BRAVO on the new exercise routine and resolve. As I think I mentioned upthread when you mentioned walking over lunch...I think it is the best thing you can do for YOU! Great for bp, stress-reducing, etc.
Don't know if I've ever mentioned this, but my first year of graduate school was probably the single worst year of my life. I was under a lot of stress. For me, this physically manifests itself in my stomach being upset. I also did not own a car, so I had to go everywhere by bus. Not a fun combo. Exercise was one key to helping me get my stress down to manageable levels.

Up early for no reason.

Read Deborah Levy's Swimming Home.

Husband woke up around 10 AM. He is still sick, but seems to have turned a corner since January 1, and was down to around a 3 or 4 on a scale of 1-10, with 10 being the sickest. Today he woke up and announced he felt "a little worse." Fantastic. Day 76 and all is (still) not well. His chest x-ray and head CT of sinus cavities looked good, according to doctor. But if he doesn't feel better soon, they will send to a specialist.
I have been re-reading my 2012 diaries, which refreshed my recollection: he had another month-plus illness in February-March of 2012. I think spending 3 or more months of 2012 sick is a lot. His doctor says it is because of the asthma, that it makes him more vulnerable. If that is true, then I don't think his current asthma management strategy is good enough. Surely not every person with asthma is sick this much?

So I took Child to gymnastics.
12-1--Child's gymnastics. I read.
1:15--Trip to bookstore. Before I knew it, Child had talked me into getting her five books!

Some more chit-chat about our possible decor for downstairs rec room. We are having a lot of fun making plans. My sister seems concerned that it will be hard to get this fun and funky look right and that we should hire a decorator. She may be right, but my feeling is that we only have to please ourselves. Walls are SW Undercool Blue. We are doing a pink sofa, zebra throw pillows. Built in bookcase. Probably a mini fridge and microwave in black. Child likes this side table, and we are considering it:

The aesthetic we are going for is Barbie Dream House for Book-Loving Barbie. ;)

Another possible accent piece, to hold board games, etc. (Don't worry--it would not be right next to the other funky piece):

3:30ish--6 miles on treadmill...but something was not right. Treadmill was not recording mileage! IFit did a new version of their software a few weeks back and there have been some problems since then. What's weird is that I also worked out 12/27, 12/28, 12/29, 12/30, 1/1, and 1/3, and did not have this problem.

SET I: 8.5 mins @6.0 mph/1.5 min @6.8 mph x 3 = 30 mins.
SET II: 2 mins @4.3 mph/8 mins @ 6.0 mph x 3 = 30 mins.
5 additional mins @ 4.3 mph to cool down.


Pet cat and dipped into the next book I'm reading, Tan Twan Eng's Garden of Evening Mists.

Spent some time reading through 2012 diaries, thinking back on what went well and what could be improved from 2012. Then wrote in 2013 diary.


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That is a funky fun table. I'm with you on doing it yourselves, btw. Your sister is probably right; a designer COULD nail the look you're after. But then it would be her/his room, not yours. This way, you get to pick the pieces that you like, even accumulate them over time and it'll be all yours. It's much more personal that way. :)


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I left out a few things. Must be brief; if I don't get DS to B&N soon, he will be forced to kill me. *not entirely kidding*

GF who was out on disability came back to work. Yay, right? No. Wrong. For reasons that escape me, she decided to come back to work without being cleared by her doctor or the insurance company. Everything was fine until she had to either call in or leave early three times within a week. So, of course, her manager looked into what was going on and found out that she was not authorized to be back. Then she got walked out by security. These folks take legal liability seriously. Not authorized to work = not working. Period. When I realized what was going on, I made sympathetic noises, meanwhile thinking, "What a bone-headed move!" Grr. I hate it when friends do stupid stuff then expect you to back them up.

GF who was diagnosed with MS last year is not doing well at all. *sigh*

Spent much of December plus holiday break discussing PE with DS. He wants to switch from weightlifting, which is what he's scheduled for, back into regular PE. For two months, now, he's been saying, "I want to switch, Mom." I've been coming back with, "But weightlifting is good for you. It's a lifelong sport. It will help you build muscle mass. It's the only way to change your body shape to be bigger in the chest and smaller in the gut. It will help you define that gorgeous six-pack you have, etc. " No. I had no intention of signing DS's schedule change form.

Then yesterday, he hits me with the whammy. "The guys in weight lifting will laugh at the way I run." Oy! Are you kidding me?!? But I believe DS. Weight lifting class involves something called "suicides" which involve flat out running back and forth across the football field for a warm-up, before lifting weights. For all its zero tolerance no bullying policy, I know that DS's school has plenty of bullying. For some reason, I always assumed that the thick-necked jocks were all in the football program. Now I have visions of thick-necked jocks in weightlifting class, harassing my admittedly non-athletic (but still muscular and very cute) son. I say, "Bring me the form and I'll sign, as long as you discuss it with P first." P is DS's very good friend, also a geek, who has been in weightlifting all year so far. DS respects his opinion. Even though I respect P's opinion less than DS does (P is fifteen; what does he know?) I think that this is a great opportunity for DS to get input from respected sources other than me, then make and live with his own decision. It's SOOOO nice to be a single parent and not have to discuss these things. :D

The other flag this raises is why the heck DS, in all these two months of discussion, didn't tell me WHY he wanted to switch. "Because the idea of my weightlifting made you so happy, Mom." Arrrrrgh! You're going to put yourself in the way of bullies because I want you to take a certain class?!?!?! Pulling out hair, fake and real. DS and I need to talk, and that's a fact. *sigh*


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Okay. So I left out two more things. So sue me.

I got a really encouraging, upbuilding and informative PM from a fellow DFer who threw down the weight-loss/improved health gauntlet and told me lots of stuff she knows that I didn't. That's right. This chick takes no prisoners AND requires no handicap. It's ONNNN, sister!!!! Thank you! :)

Two: I exchanged emails with the ex (whom I've decided to call The Plaintiff from now on. Thanks K. You crack me up.) regarding DS's failure to show up from his scheduled Christmas visit, due to snow and ice. The Plaintiff says nothing, just reschedules the flight. My mind is blown to tiny little bits. The man who bullied me for twenty years and who still *tries to* bully DS has apparently realized that he has no legal leg to stand on when it comes to visitation. Who the heck is he and what has he done with The Plaintiff I despise?

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